Saturday, June 25, 2011

Walk of Fameish, sort of

The Hollywood Chamber of Commerce has announced the lucky winners of Walk of Fame stars for 2012.  Here they are, along with my italicized snarky comments:

Motion Pictures: Jennifer Aniston, Vin Diesel, Scarlett Johansson, John Lasseter, Malcolm McDowell, Sumner Redstone, Kate Winslet and Richard Burton (posthumous)

Aniston and Diesel are the biggest head-scratchers here.  Aniston is the poster child for actors who 1) don't make the transition from small screen stardom to big screen stardom and 2)  Hollywood seems determined to shove down our throats as movie stars despite it just  not happening.  Vin Diesel is Vin Diesel and both will no doubt receive their stars on dates that coincide with the release of their latest big screen bombs.

Television: Valerie Bertinelli, Matt Groening, Mariska Hargitay, Patricia Heaton, Marg Helgenberger, Walter Koenig and Adam West.

Aniston would make more sense in this category, since she was on one of the most successful sitcoms in TV.   Ditto Groening, Hargitay, Heaton and Helgenberger (times two with China Beach and CSI).  Bertinelli is borderline, I think she gets a nod simply for longevity.  I can see her and Aniston competing for the same Lifetime MOW roles in the not so far off future.

Walter Koenig and Adam West?  Apparently the Chamber ran out of solid candidates and have moved on to people who had one really good audition day.

Recording: Pepe Aguilar, America, Boyz II Men, Hal David, David Foster, Vince Gill, Jennifer Lopez, Ann and Nancy Wilson (Heart) and Barry White (posthumous)

Heart, Foster, Gill and White are just now getting stars?  But Jennifer Lopez and Boyz II Men don't have to wait thirty years?  I take comfort in know that if there wasn't a Jennifer Lopez, there wouldn't have been a Hennifer Lopez.

Radio: Ellen K.

Apparently every deserving radio peep has already received a star, as this choice indicates that the Chamber is now moving on to Rick Dees/Ryan Seacrest sidekicks.  Consider this classy offering from the official KIIS-FM website:
Ellen is always on the lookout for "Citizen Sleaze" to add to her :60 Seconds of Sleaze report at the bottom of every weekday morning hour.  If you see sleaze happening, email Ellen K right here to get it on the air!
The way this is going, I guess I should be relieved they didn't name any recipients for the category of live theater.  God knows who or what they would have come up with.

The thing to remember about the Walk of Fame is that it's not a place to honor stars who will be remembered for their excellence decades from now.  Sure, that happens sometime, but first and foremost it's a tourist draw, not a homage.  And like I mentioned before, it's also a marketing tool - notice (if you haven't already) how many star ceremonies coincide with the honorees' latest project.

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