Friday, July 15, 2016

CSI: Potato

Too bad there aren't any CSI's left to rip from this headline:

Arraignment In Case Involving DNA Found On Potato Scheduled For Wednesday

A Naugatuck woman charged with setting fire to a Prospect masonry company after, police said, she was tripped up by a potato she stuffed into a van tailpipe will face a judge Wednesday.
Willow Martin, 19, of Naugatuck, was charged Tuesday with second-degree arson, third-degree burglary, possession of burglar's tools, first-degree criminal mischief, attempted first-degree criminal mischief and five counts of conspiracy. She was held on $110,000 bail and is scheduled to be arraigned Wednesday at Superior Court in Waterbury.
Martin and Breonna Constantino, who were the best of friends while dancers at the Hollywood Connecticut Strip Club in Southington, had a falling out over money, according to an arrest warrant.
Martin and Constantino traveled to Wildwood, N.J., last summer and Martin loaned her friend $1,200, according to the warrant. Constantino was slow to repay the debt and that angered Martin so much that she set fire to MTM Masonry on Waterbury Road in Prospect, a business owned by Constantino's stepfather, according to the warrant.
The big break in the case? A potato stuffed into the tailpipe of a van belonging to MTM Masonry's owner. When he was notified of the fire at his business about 5 a.m. Sept. 15, and prepared to drive over, he found the tuber in the van's tailpipe, pulled it out and brought it along. He gave it to police, who had it analyzed for DNA.

The DNA actually belonged to Martin's then-boyfriend, who ratted her out. Do read the whole thing, it's hilarious. I can say that because no one was injured.

The sad part is that she's facing ten criminal counts over $300-$400 left on a personal loan of $1,200. I hope it's worth it.

Criminals are so dumb.

H/T to DP Lyle on FB.

No comments: