How to torpedo your writing career before it even begins

Today is one week out from the May 31 deadline for the NBC Universal Writers on the Verge Program and the Warner Bros. Writers' Workshop. I was even thinking of blogging about it, but there didn't seem to be much to be said except that the deadline is in a week, so I had decided not to bother.

Until I saw this on Facebook:

Writing scripts is only part of the job in television. You also have to be pleasant to work with, cooperative and know your place in the food chain. A fledgling writer is in no position to make demands.

Read that comment. Never mind that English might not be this person's first language. The grammar isn't the problem. It's the attitude.

Would you hire this person? Especially for a job that has way more people wanting in, who know how to conduct themselves professionally, than there are positions available?

There are other issues with this comment. Many successful writers have tales of having to submit countless times before scoring a meeting with an agent, an editor, or a producer. It's not something that usually happens overnight.

I don't know how many writers they select for the program - maybe a dozen -  but they must get thousands of submissions. You can't tell me at least twelve of them won't be promising writers with at least a decent attitude. I'd love to be a fly on the wall at NBC Universal to see what they think of this comment and whether it alone torpedoes this person's submission.

I do know that this is not how you break in.

This guy on my walk this morning

I'm pretty sure it's an egret, a snowy egret, I think. Also saw a California Sea Lion in the channel.

Why the obnoxious attention to detail? Because I picked this up a couple weeks ago in the local Barnes & Noble.

Apparently, the herons I've seen around are Great Blue Herons. Per the pocket guide.

When you need a good laugh

This lion is here to help!

H/T to Something Funny on FB.

This made my night

Congrats Smashville!

Say hello to HomeSense, the HomeGoods spinoff

Via Southern Living: HomeGoods spinoff store has a name and opening date.

Me:

Happy Mother's Day to my Dad: 10/8/40 - 5/14/11

When my Dad died on May 14, 2011, one thing that I didn't think of at the time was that every seven years or so, the anniversary of his death would fall on Mother's Day. Today is one of those years. I think he would be happy to know that everyone is doing well, and that Mom is going to have a great Mother's Day with The Brother and I.

I still miss him for a number of reasons. One biggie is that this year - just last month in fact - I was published for the first time. My Mom is fond of telling me that when I would send them stuff I'd written, they'd wonder if they thought it was great because I was their daughter and they couldn't be objective, or if I was really that good. That question was finally answered with LAst Resort, not to mention so far I've been acing my UCLA Extension classes.

He would have gotten a huge kick out of seeing me in print. He wasn't the easiest guy to impress, nor did he flatter or give compliments unless it was truly warranted and deserved, but he would have been having a blast with this.

I've also been able to move on from the clusterfuck of family drama created after he died and was no longer around to rule with an iron fist. Sometimes it actually helps to have one of those in the family, so that you don't have the inmates running the asylum. That whole episode was a bitter pill for a long time, not only because of the stress and aggravation it caused, but especially because it was so hatefully disrespectful of what everyone knew were his final wishes and what he would have wanted. But that crap is now in the past, and there it will stay. For the most part.

Because whether you consider it making lemonade when life gives you lemons, or every cloud having a silver lining, the fact is that although I once thought I'd never want to revisit that period of my life, with the passage of time it has in fact provided me with a ton of story fodder I wouldn't have otherwise had, including my Better Call Saul script for the UCLA program. And I know my Dad would have loved that.

Rest in peace, Dad, and know that all is finally well.

The Venezuela Diet

This has been making the rounds on the internets today. Not to make fun of a dire situation, but this is funny (and sadly, accurate): The Venezuela Diet. Share it with the social justice warrior in your life!

The "Apple" Store.

Scenes from an overcast beach morning

Overcast during beach walk this morning. Didn't care.

Stormy looking skies eventually gave way to sunshine.

Bird was here. Probably a gull.

Lots of doggies out this morning. This one left prints that
looked like a little bear.

Venice Pier. I'm pretty sure I've taken a shot in the past
that looked almost exactly like this.

Now this really confused me. On a few occassions I've seen LAX reverse it's usual "take off to the west (over the ocean)/land from the east" pattern during bad weather. But for some reason today, this guy landed from over the ocean. Even weirder, I saw a couple others taking off in the normal direction. Not sure what his deal was.

The crime trope that won't die

Lee Lofland (founder of Writers' Police Academy) would like to point out yet again, there is no such thing as cordite, people! 

Although your favorite TV detective might glean that a vic was shot very recently because the smell of cordite is lingering in the air, which also means the perp can't have gone far...no, he/she doesn't, seeing as how they haven't manufactured the stuff since World War II. I don't know why this is so prevalent after all these years, but it is. For some reason, readers/viewers with little to no knowledge of police work or detective work have been conditioned to understand that the supposed presence of cordite = a gun has very recently been fired.

Nope. And I keep hearing real cops don't use "perp", either.

One of the panelists at the L.A. Times Festival of Books mentioned that if you get gun details wrong, you'll hear about it from numerous readers. I would start by not using cordite as a story device.

Some advice from an editor re: submissions

Okay, not the most exciting title I've ever given to a blog post, but this is good stuff: The Biggest Mistake You Can Make When Submitting Your Work.

There's actually several good pieces of advice in the article. It reminded me of hearing that the problem with entering writing contests is that a lot of work is submitted because it's the deadline, not because the work is ready to be submitted. I've probably done that a few times myself over the years.

H/T to Aerogramme Writers' Studio on FB for the link.

Holy fucking shit

Pardon my language, but this wreaked major havoc with my fear of heights. I feel queasy just watching it online. No way I'd ever be able to do this:

Who in their right mind does this? And who keeps turning around to film instead of watching where they're going? You're just one spooked or stumbling mule away from a nightmarish death. Sweet Jesus.

H/T (I guess) to Shit Only Horse Riders Understand on FB.

Hold on to your paychecks...

Whole Foods looking at lowering prices across the board.

Does this mean they'll no longer be known as "whole paycheck"?

Now if only they could do something about parking on the westside of L.A.

H/T to House Beautiful Magazine on FB for the link.