Thursday, April 28, 2011

An inconvenient truth: Even tree hugging hippies have a price.

For the Santa Monica Mountains Conservancy, that price is a cool million in cash and "services".
The state planning agency that oversees open space in the Santa Monica Mountains will drop its opposition to a controversial bid by U2 guitarist The Edge to build a compound of homes above Malibu in exchange for more than $1 million in funding, consulting services and trail easements from the musician and his partners.
The Edge would like to build a compound of five mansions on the 156 acre chunk of land.  I'm sure it would fit right in.  Oh, wait...
But the project has been stymied by widespread opposition from conservation groups and the California Coastal Commission, who say it would scar an undeveloped ridgeline visible from much of the Malibu coastline and disturb geological features and sensitive habitat.

In 2009 the conservancy wrote a letter to the coastal commission strongly opposing the project, saying it was inconsistent with the state Coastal Act and would be impossible to build without “unavoidable significant adverse visual and ecological impacts.”
Gotta say, the Santa Monica Mountains Conservancy sold out waaaay to cheap.  One million has to be chump change to this guy.  Seriously, he'll probably dig it out from between the cushions of his sofa.

Maybe it's because I'm not celeb-obsessed, but he looks like the kind of tool who would build a huge compound in the Santa Monica Mountains. 

And from our friends at The Department of Stating the Obvious:
Critics characterized the deal as Evans buying the agency’s silence.
You don't say?

Let's just hope the California Coastal Commission and The Sierra Club (both mentioned in the article as still opposing the development) can withstand the siren call of The Edge's filthy lucre.

Pic snicked from L.A. Times article linked above.

Flawed but fascinating character brings our long national nightmare to an end. Sente ensues.

Yesterday, Barack Obama and his administration did something they should have done a long time ago: They released Obama's birth certificate.

It's about damn time.  I mean, what took them so long?  Especially since this is the official Obama/White House take (at least publicly) on the matter:
"The President believed the distraction over his birth certificate wasn't good for the was bad for the American people and distracting from the many challenges we face as a country,"

"At a time of great consequence for this country--when we should be debating how we win the future, reduce our deficit, deal with high gas prices, and bring stability to the Middle East, Washington, DC, was once again distracted by a fake issue," Pfeiffer said. "The President's hope is that with this step, we can move on to debating the bigger issues that matter to the American people and the future of the country."
Really?  It's because they care?  Obama released the "certificate of live birth" in 2008 and despite the uproar that it wasn't sufficient proof and that supposedly "The President believed the distraction over his birth certificate wasn't good for the country", he waited until 2011 to put this matter to bed.  If it was so bad for the country, why didn't he just release it in 2008 and spare his supposedly beloved America from being "distracted by a fake issue"?  Is it because he's childish and immature and has to do things his way?  Because he felt it was politically advantageous to hold this matter over the heads of his opponents?
"We're not going to be able to solve our problems if we get distracted by sideshows and carnival barkers."
As usual, it was someone else's fault.  The guy is literally unable to accept responsibility for anything.

If it wasn't a legitimate issue but the ridiculous stuff of sideshows and carnies, why not release the birth certificate in 2008 and put this to bed quickly and easily?  By dragging it out for years it was Obama and his administration, not "carnival barkers" or those cahraaazy birthers, that made the birth certificate issue not only seem like a legitimate thing to question, but kept it in the news and turned it into a distraction and a sideshow. 

 "I'll take Things That Are Bad For America for two hundred, Alex.  What?"

On a fictional side note I would really love to see the American Sideshow Carnival Barkers Association protest the President's characterization of them as nutjobs and the resulting backpedaling and obligatory apology, and possibly another beer summit.  Yeah, that's going in the script.
Mr. Obama said he has watched the debate over his birth place with bemusement.
Disingenuous much?  Because again, he could have easily quashed this matter years ago.  And since being born here is a requirement for the job, I'm not sure what was so confusing to him about people simply wanting this important matter cleared up, especially if it was something that could have been dealt with so easily.  A few years ago I signed up with a temp agency that asked me to bring in a copy of my birth certificate (among other documents) and you know what?  They got it.  It wasn't a big deal.  A friggin' temp agency.

Why wait?  Why now, finally?

Fritzworth at Ace of Spades HQ has some interesting answers to those questions and I agree that #3 is the most telling and compelling (bold mine):
Obama has just handed the Republican Party an enormous gift in releasing his long-form birth certificate (or, as Obama curiously put it, "additional information"). Why does this help the GOP? Three reasons, at least:

1) It deflates (and may even kill off) the Trump candidacy. I see this as a great help to the GOP; your mileage may vary.

2) It provides every other GOP presidential candidate coverage on the birth issue ("Hey, he released his birth certificate. That's good enough for me."). For that matter, it should help relegate birthers to a much smaller corner of the GOP big tent.

3) It shows the internal stress that Obama and his camp are feeling.

Let's talk about that last item. Obama could have done this months or years ago, but didn't. More importantly, he could have held off for months more -- particularly until the GOP campaign was far more advanced, with various candidates committed (or not) to the birther issue -- and then released it to make birther-sympathetic (or even -agnostic) candidates look like fools. But he released it now. Why?

Well, it's hard not to believe that Drudge's headline of yesterday ("Only 38% of Americans certain Obama born here", or words to that effect) was a motivation. Likewise, it's hard to believe that the pending release (in three weeks) of "Where's the Birth Certificate?" by Jerome Corsi (currently #28 overall in books on Amazon) isn't a factor as well.

I think that Obama and his campaign managers are very worried. Poll numbers are dropping. Late night comics have started to turn on Obama. Even the New York Times noted that the QE2 flooding provided little stimulus but has fueled inflation. And...only 38% of Americans are sure Obama was born here.

In the game of Go, there is a concept called sente. If you have sente, it means that your opponent is forced to respond directly to each of your moves rather than carry out his own strategy. This release by Obama suggests the Republicans have sente right now. Obama has been trying to maintain (or regain) sente himself by attacking Ryan Paul Ryan and other fiscal realists as "extremists", but I think he's losing even that effort.
Even late night comics are turning on him?  Surely that's a sign of the Obamapocalypse.  You're talking about a guy who is notoriously thin-skinned and who thrives on political popularity (especially in the popular and mainstream media) and the tacit approval that popularity confers on him personally.

See, here's how I look at it: How can I use this in a script?  There are so many options.  The character whose citizenship is in question could be a power-hungry man-child who bristles at any criticism, no matter how increasingly legitimate it might be.  On second thought, that might be too obvious.

Obama would make a great fictional character.  Endlessly flawed but unable to see himself as the least bit lacking, surrounded by yes men and a yes media.  He dismisses his critics with a smug, narcissistic condescension that reminds one of a child who has to have the last word Every. Single. Time.  As a writer, I am endlessly fascinated by the flawed character that is Barack Obama.  Perfect characters are annoying and boring.  Heroes, like the rest of us, cannot be perfect, they have to their vulnerabilities.  There's a difference between vulnerability and weakness.  One is human and other humans can relate to it, the other is a character flaw.  Villains can't tell the difference, so they hide both their weaknesses and vulnerabilities behind destructive, anti-social actions.

The problem with this scenario is that Barack Obama isn't a fictional character.  He's real.  Very real.  And very flawed.  It would be nice to see him let down the facade once in a while and show some humanity that all of his constituents - not just those that kiss his ass - could connect to.  I'm not holding my breath.  I think he would consider that weak, not to mention he doesn't seem to feel the need to connect with anyone not kissing his ass.

Maybe he wanted or needed this to be a distraction.  But why?  What could be worse than being President without the birth certificate to back it up?  What even more nefarious plan or action is he trying to distract us from?  Dun dun DUUUUUUUNNNN!!!!

And that's the thing about Obama, at least in my opinion.  As a character, he's fascinating and watchable.  The audience would be waiting breathlessly to see what stunt he pulls next and even more importantly, gets away with next (with a big assist to his enablers in the media) before a true hero eventually brings him down.

I'm also fascinated by his tendency to bow to foreign leaders he has no obligation to kowtow to, especially those that rank among royalty in their own countries.  In my story, that's what he aspires to.  He doesn't just want to be President, he wants to be King.


I'm just saying, maybe next 
time don't bow to the Saudi 
King.  It looks bad to the 
American people.

The people?

You know, the little people.

Biden, Reid and Pelosi laugh hysterically, then exit.

Fools.  I'll show them.  
Someday I'll be king.  And 
everyone will  bow down before 
meeeee!!!  AHAHAHAHA!!!!



Oh yeah.  That's definitely going in the script.

Podium pic snicked from Wall Street Journal article linked above
Signing pic by Carolyn Kaster/AP

Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Goodnight, sweet goalie

The Kings were eliminated last night in Game 6 of the first round of the Stanley Cup playoffs, so this is the post in which I officially kiss the 2010-2011 season goodbye.  We had such high hopes for you, boys.  October 2010 doesn't seem that long ago.  This season really flew by.

We still love you Kings (especially you, Jonathan Quick)

Bring on 2011-2012.  God knows it can't be any crazier or more frustrating than what we just went through, especially since the guys are going to be another year older, another year wiser (right???) and more experienced.  It will also hopefully see the arrival and emergence of Brayden Schenn (and a few other promising prospects) as full-fledged NHLers.

Also, we seriously need scoring and a decent power play.  A couple of goals here and there (on the PP and at full strength) and the Kings season plays out very differently.  This was an issue all year and needs to be addressed.  We absolutely cannot go through another season wishing league rules allowed us to decline power plays.

Congratulations to the San Jose Sharks for moving on to the second round.  Here's hoping your fans actually stay for the rest of your games, win or lose.

Photo credit: Danny Moloshok (AP)

Monday, April 25, 2011

Via Franklin Avenue: When cable channels were what they said they were

During the 80's, I can remember thinking that 80's era stuff just wasn't going to age well.  As awesome as it all seemed at the time, it was just a gut feeling I had and I think I've been proven right over the years.  Let's face it, those of us who lived it and wore crap like leggings, torn t-shirts and six inches of bangle bracelets on arms bared by shoved-up jacket sleeves have become laughable relics of a decade probably best remembered for unfortunate fashion choices.  Although I will say that after going through an awkward "guilty pleasure" stage, the music has held up a lot better than expected.

One thing we did have going for us during that decade was the advent of cable and its shiny new networks.  Unlike the big three broadcast nets (ABC, CBS and NBC) cable stations were much more specific in their programming and were dedicated to a particular audience, be it through genre or artisitic preservation and/or philosophy.  Let's see how those noble intentions held up over the years, shall we?

The always awesome Franklin Avenue brings us this collection of cable station promos from the 80's, when a cable channel's programming actually matched up with their name and stated mission.  Of course I have to weigh in with my own smart ass observations of the promos versus current programming.

TLC (The Learning Channel): Then: Inner space, outer space, international programming, college prep, arts & crafts and history.  Now: I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant, 19 and Counting, Kate Plus Eight, Sister Wives, Toddlers and Tiaras, My Strange Addiction, and Hoarding: Buried Alive.  What exactly are we supposed to be learning here?

A&E (Arts & Entertainment Network): Hoarders, Intervention, Relapse, Parking Wars, Storage Wars.  In their defense, A&E also airs The First 48 (arguably the best real-life crime show on television) and Criminal Minds reruns, so perhaps a better name for the net would be C&E (Crime & Entertainment or Crap & Entertainment, depending on when you happen to tune in).

VH1 (Video Hits 1): "Coming up this hour, videos..."  Hahaha, kidding!!!  The one-time home of Pop-Up Video now brings us Celebrity Rehab, Ru Paul's Drag Race, My Big Friggin' Wedding, Mob Wives, Basketball Wives and various showcases for a batch of has-beens and never-weres who fit the basic cabler's no doubt extremely limited budget.

AMC (American Movie Classics) "...the way they were meant to be seen, uncut and uninterrupted."  Psych!!!  AMC went to the dark side when they decided that classic films were not, in fact, meant to be seen uncut and uninterrupted (no doubt to the delight of Turner Classic Films and Fox Movie Channel).  To AMC's credit they have been extremely successful since moving into original programming a few years ago with Emmy winners Mad Men and Breaking Bad, but that's all the more reason for them to rebrand with a more accurate name.

Bravo: The hardest U-turn of any of these channels.  I mean, watch the promo.  Anouk Aimee?  Anita O'Day?  Teresa Wright?  Geraldine Chaplin?  Merchant Ivory?  French New Wave?  Godard?  Truffaut?  Fellini?  Who are these people?  Forget them, tune in to Bravo nowadays for the painfully awkward manufactured drama of shallow, obnoxious and unlikeable personal trainers, stylists, real estate agents and social-climbing housewives.  Sure, the artists mentioned in Bravo's 1987 promo may not have been relateable, but at least we could admire them and their work.  Another net that should rebrand.  May I suggest RSN (Reality Suckage Network).

The Family Channel (currently ABC Family): ABC Family is the anti-Bravo in that it has not strayed far from its original incarnation, despite several changes in ownership.  I can't really think of anything snarky to say about its lineup.  Interesting factoid: There was a stipulation in The Family Channel's sale from founder Pat Robertson's CBN (Christian Broadcasting Network) to secular ownership in 1997 that required the channel to continue to carry religious programming, which is does to this day.

HLN (Headline News): Back when the news business meant actually reporting the news rather than editing or slanting it to push an agenda (at least not as blatantly as they do today) and We Report, You Decide was every news outlet's unofficial slogan, Headline News was a go-to network for breaking news.  How does 1986 Headline News compare to today's HLN Initially airing tightly-formatted 30-minute newcasts around the clock, since 2005, the channel has increasingly aired long-form pop culture news and opinion programming.  Current programming includes shows hosted by Joy Behar, Dr. Drew and Nancy Grace.  Don't worry, nowadays in case of emergency there's always Twitter for breaking news.

BTW, if you enjoy old promos then Franklin Avenue needs to be a weekly destination, especially for Southern Californians.  Most of the retro promos Mike posts are old local ads and are guaranteed to send you into an Angeleno nostalgia fest.  Retro Fridays are just one of many reasons FA is one of the most popular and important L.A. blogs.

Sunday, April 24, 2011

Team Quick

Jonathan Quick is Saturday's #1 star per (and L.A. Kings fans):

He may not be a Vezina candidate (yet) but he's the number one goalie in our hearts!

Quick set two franchise records in last night's 3-1 do-or-die victory over the Sharks in San Jose by facing 52 shots and stopping 51 of them.  The Sharks still lead the series 3 games to 2, but this being hockey, it's not over until it's over and I think the Kings may have the advantage here in that everyone knows the Sharks have a penchant for choking in the playoffs no matter how good their regular season might have been, while no one ever seems to know which Kings team is going to show up.  Will it be the Saturday night defensive demolition crew?  Or will it be the immature, frustrating jerks who couldn't hold a 4-0 lead in front of a rabid, hugely supportive home crowd?  No one knows and the Sharks can only hope it's the latter.

And speaking of hugely supportive crowds, let's not and instead discuss the shameful Sharks "fans".  Yet again there were huge chunks of unoccupied sections behind Quick as last night's game wound down, despite the fact that the Sharks were only down two goals, were certainly getting a lot of shots on Quick and of course, it's not only a playoff game, but a game in which the Sharks could have eliminated the Kings and secured a spot in the second round.  With "support" like that, no wonder the Kings have beaten them two out of three at HP Pavilion.  Make fun of the Kings poor performance at home all you want, but while L.A. fans may leave Staples Center unhappy, they don't leave until the final buzzer and they're back the next night as enthusiastic, supportive and hopeful as ever.  I just don't get the HP Pavilion crowd.

Game 6 is Monday night at Staples Center. GO KINGS!!!

UPDATE: Less than an hour after I posted this, the Nashville Predators eliminated the Anaheim Ducks from the Stanley Cup playoffs.  Way to go Preddies!  As for the Quacks: Bailey has some words for you!

Thursday, April 21, 2011

A puppet President in America? You don't say.

At some point I will seriously sit down to see where this guy is on various issues that I think are important and try to get a feel for what he'd bring to the office, but for now only one thing springs to mind when I hear that Gary Johnson announced his candidacy for President.  This guy:

Don't recognize him?  Are you kidding?  He saved the world!

I can't believe another presidential election season is upon us already.  It feels like we just barely survived the last one.  And yet here we go again with the crazy!

Dance for the puppet master Gary!  Dance!

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Hawaiians love their Spam...and I don't mean the online kind

But still, this is a bit much.  I mean really, Spam flavored macadamia nuts?

Classic flavor???

Not to be culturally insensitive or anything, but EEEEEEEWWWWW!!!!

Photo taken at the KTA in Keahou.

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Hockey 'tard (if you'll pardon the expression) at large

So yesterday some hack from a San Jose paper, possibly still stinging from the Sharks humiliation at the hands of the L.A. Kings Saturday night or perhaps just suddenly becoming aware of the print media's rapid decline into irrelevance and seized by a desperate need to justify his continued employment and existence, decided to needlessly insult and piss off Kings Nation by insinuating that our arena is a dead zone that actually benefits the visiting team.  Anyone who has ever set foot in Staples during a Kings game can tell you that nothing could be further from the truth and that the place gets even crazier in the post season, something that dates back to the Fabulous/Great Western Forum days.

But in the grand tradition of today's failing media, Mark Purdy of the Silicon Valley Mercury News wasn't about to let any pesky facts get in his way.  Some "highlights" from Purdy's "column" (with my comments in italics):
So. Big home-ice advantage for the Kings, right? At playoff time, the National Hockey League is famous for impossibly raucous, loud and intimidating buildings.
Staples Center is not one of them, though.
Yet as hockey venues go ... well, if HP Pavilion can be a Metallica concert when the puck drops, Staples is more of a Kenny G experience.
So apparently Kenny G wins big over Metallica when it comes to having dedicated and die-hard fans who will stick it out until the end of the show, as opposed to Sharks "fans" who departed Game 2 en masse early because their team was losing.  Have these people ever watched a hockey game?  Because if they had they'd know how quickly things can turn around in this sport which is why you NEVER leave a hockey game early and ESPECIALLY not a friggin' playoff game.  Way to support your team diehards.  Seriously, by the time the final buzzer sounded in Game 2 a good third of the crowd had already bailed.  It looked like a Dodger game.
"The Kings are a strong defensive team," Sharks coach Todd McLellan said. "I don't think it had anything to do with the building."
It might, however, have something to do with the NHL's rule about home teams receiving the last line change during clock stoppages.
What that means: Kings coach Terry Murray can match up the players he wants against whichever Sharks players skate out for a faceoff.  
First of all, we know what "that" means.  Thanks anyway for the remedial hockey lesson.  Another thing we all know: the line change advantage is true of any NHL arena and therefore has nothing to do with Staples.  I believe the expression we're looking for here is "grasping at straws".
Of course, if you were watching Game 1 and Game 2 closely, then you noticed that the Kings were usually able to get defensemen Rob Scuderi and Willie Mitchell onto the ice against the Sharks' top line of Joe Thornton, Patrick Marleau and Devin Setoguchi. All three are scoreless in the series.
Um, Mitchell is actually paired with Drew Doughty, who finally remembered who he was Saturday night and as a result proceeded to personally destroy the Sharks, snagging two goals and two assists while Mitchie minded things at home.  So yes, the Kings dominate defensively; Purdy got that much right.  However, it's their game plan every night and not exactly a state secret or journalism career-making observation.
Douglas Murray (no relation to coach Terry)...
Hard to believe when you consider what an unusual name "Murray" is.  I mean, how can they not be related?  Not that that has anything to do with hockey, plus wouldn't Sharks fans know this by now?  As as a writer, I file this under "padding your essay and hoping the instructor won't notice you're totally winging it."
Concentrating better should also be less problematic in a non-riotous place such as Staples.
Winning at Staples won't be a snap, especially with the Kings so jacked up about a potential first-round upset. But at least the Sharks' attention won't be diverted by an overwhelming din.
Your choices of responses to this article are as follows: A) Purdy has never been to a hockey game at Staples Center but shot his mouth off anyway; B) Purdy has never been to a Kings playoff game at Staples Center but shot his mouth off anyway; C) Purdy is an idiot about to discover firsthand that karma and payback are unforgiving identical twin bitches or D) All of the above (aka Things That Come Back to Bite You In the Ass When You Don't Know What the Hell You're Talking About But You Shoot Your Mouth Off Anyway).
In contrast, check out this observation of the playoff atmosphere at Staples by ESPN (from my Kings hockey is almost upon us post from last October, bold added):
I caught two playoff games at Staples Center this past spring and thought the roof was going to collapse. It's amazing to see hockey back in L.A., and this team shouldn't disappoint. Drew Doughty, Willie Mitchell, Rob Scuderi and Jack Johnson as your top four on D? Hello!
Let's face it, ESPN >>>> Mercury News.

I don't know if Purdy is really that ignorant of Kings fans and Staples Center crowds or if he just saw this as a way of getting his name all over the hockey portion of the internets.  Either way, he has gotten his name all over the hockey portion of the internets and has lit a fire under an already fired up Kings team and their fans:

Screen shot 2011-04-19 at 12.23.21 PM

Getting back to the empty seats littering HP Pavilion when the Sharks were being shutout by Jonathan Quick and Friends, they were so numerous that even the Sharks players apparently noticed, prompting Sharks rookie star Logan Couture to tweet after the game pleading with their fans to forget San Jose's tendency to choke in the playoffs and hang in there:

Screen shot 2011-04-19 at 9.17.27 AM
It was RT by the team's mascot but when I went back to get a screenshot of it, I couldn't find it on his Twitter feed.  Deleted?  No matter, I had already responded to it and therefore captured it for all eternity:

Screen shot 2011-04-19 at 9.15.36 AM
In fact, I had tweeted this observation earlier, before the game was even over:

Screen shot 2011-04-19 at 9.15.52 AM
So I don't want to hear any crap about Kings fans or Staples Center failing when it comes to the playoffs.  Especially not from San Jose.  In just a few hours Mark Purdy is going to find out just how loud and raucous Staples Center is and how much better Kings fans are than Sharks fans.  As frustrating as they can be at times (and bless their hearts, they can be extremely frustrating at times) Kings fans are passionately crazy about our team and for his sake I hope Purdy comes prepared with earplugs.  Or maybe a sound-proofed room to lock himself into.

I also hope he won't mind seeing this tonight, as this is usually what happens when the Kings win:

Hot D-Man on Goalie action!  No, non-hockey peeps, it doesn't mean what you think it means.  Having said that, don't you just want to throw rice at them?  Get a room you guys!


Smoochie photo credit: Danny Moloshok (AP) although at this point pretty much every Kings fan online has saved it to their hard drive for many future references.  Mr. Moloshok, you have our eternal gratitude for this shot.

Friday, April 15, 2011

Hawaii Five-O theme, marching band style

In a continuing nod to the island paradise I currently find myself in I give you this vid, which hit the internets last year as part of a promotion mounted by CBS for its then-upcoming series Hawaii Five-O.  I have no idea how they choreograph this stuff or how the band members know where they are and where to go on the field (while playing their instruments) but this was an amazing performance.

University of Notre Dame Marching Band kicks ass

Thursday, April 14, 2011

"This is not what I signed up for."

Us either, jackass.

This has to be one of the most quotable things I've ever seen, so instead of obnoxiously quoting every other line, I'll just embed this baby for your viewing enjoyment. is that all working out for you?

Posted from *wink, wink* Hawaii.

Sunday, April 10, 2011

McDonald's, Hawaiian style

While running errands today, Mom, The Sis and I stopped at McDonald's to get a drink.  This was on the menu:


Yeah, you don't see that in L.A.

Wednesday, April 6, 2011

Not The Los Angeles Kings

Homeplatelogo A bunch of fake L.A. Kings accounts have popped up on Twitter recently and I have to say, they are amusing as hell.

So far I've found the following: Not Matt GreeneNot Drew DoughtyNot a Big Red Dog (Kyle Clifford), Not The Hand of Zus (Michal Handzus), The Mitch 33 (Willie Mitchell), AmeriJack3 (Jack Johnson), LAKScapegoat (Kevin Westgarth) and NAWiskey (Davis Drewisky).

There's also a fake Fake Jim Fox! Whoa!

Our goalies are so freaking awesome they each have two fake accounts.  Real Jonathan Quick is currently being impersonated online by Fake Jon Quick and the wonderfully named No Goals For You.  Unfortunately this name did not apply during our game at San Jose the other night when Quick's Jedi Mind Tricks powers deserted him and he uncharacteristically coughed up four goals before being yanked in the second period.  If you haven't heard about said Jedi powers, check out this save versus the Calgary Flames last month where Quick redirected the puck with his mind.  Seriously, it's been all over the internets.  Get with it.

Backup goalie Jonathan Bernier pulls double Twitter duty as Not Jon Bernier and GoalieLikeG6 (I have no idea what that name means, although I feel like I should be getting it and will feel like an idiot when someone explains it to me).

So far the only fake King following me back is Fake Jon Quick, who castigated me for calling him fake while simultaneously advising me to ignore his fake name.  I want to believe in you Jonathan Quick, I really do.  Please crush the Yotes tonight so we can lock up that playoff spot and the fiasco at the Shark Tank will be forgiven and never spoken of again.

Apparently there's no love for a fake Anze Kopitar, although with Kopi rehabbing after ankle surgery maybe he'll have time to set up a Real Anze account.  Kings fans would love that.

I'm only aware of two Kings players who are on the Twitters for reals: Our Captain Dustin Brown and the recently recalled Oscar Moller, who really needs to update his location.

I can't believe the season is ending this weekend.  It feels like just a couple months ago that The Bro and I were at his favorite sports bar watching our boys open the season with a shootout win over Vancouver.  That was October.  Now all of a sudden it'sApril and for hockey fans that means only one thing: Playoffs start next week!  Go Kings!!!

4/7/11 Update: Add Fake Coach to the list!  Also, the Kings finally clinched a playoff spot last night with a shootout (Quick strikes again) victory over the Yotes. Next up: Try to sweep the final two games - home and away - versus the Quacks to try and nail down home ice advantage in the first round.  Go Kings!!!

Tuesday, April 5, 2011

Oh Los Angeles, I love you. Don't ever change.

This was the hit of the local internets this morning: Man arrested after running naked down the 405. And yes, there is a picture. Way to go commuter!

The only way this could be any better is if he hadn't assaulted anyone. I hope the woman is okay. None of the reports I've seen so far have any details of the attack or how badly she was hurt.

Okay, he wasn't completely nude. He was wearing socks. But still...only in LA!