Public Domain Day strikes again

January 1 has become a double holiday for creatives. In addition to welcoming a new year, it is also now recognized as the day copyrighted works are welcomed into the public domain. That's right - January 1 is Public Domain Day. 

Several classic animated characters and shorts have just hit the public domain. Post-Steamboat Willie Mickey Mouse (now talking and clad in his familiar white gloves), Popeye, and Tintin are now fair game, as are the first Silly Symphonies, including the classic The Skeleton Dance. 

 

Some major novels are now in the public domain: The Sound and the Fury (William Faulkner), A Farewell to Arms (Ernest Hemingway), The Maltese Falcon (Dashiell Hammett), A Room of One's Own (Virginia Woolf), Seven Dials Mystery (Agatha Christie), The Roman Hat Mystery (Ellery Queen's debut), and the first English translation of All Quiet on the Western Front (Erich Maria Remarque).

 

Among the films now in the public domain are The Marx Brothers' debut The Cocoanuts, Best Picture Winner The Broadway Melody, Pandora's Box (directed by G.W. Pabst, starring Louise Brooks), Blackmail (Alfred Hitchcock's first talkie), The Wild Party (Clara Bow's first talkie), and Hallelujah, one of the first major studio films with an all-black cast (directed by King Vidor).

Some classic songs and musical compositions hit the public domain yesterday: Singin' in the Rain, Ain't Misbehavin', Happy Days are Here Again, Tiptoe Through the Tulips, An American in Paris, and Bolero. Actual recordings now up for grabs are California Here I Come (Al Jolson), Rhapsody in Blue (George Gershwin), and Shreveport Stomp (Jelly Roll Morton).

In addition to the above, there are also poetry and artwork losing their copyrights. A comprehensive list can be found at Duke University's Center for the Study of the Public Domain, and be sure to scroll down to the section where they discuss the importance of the public domain. You may or may not agree with their point of view, but they still make some compelling arguments for the release of works to anyone who wants to use them.

I feel a low-budget horror film coming on

Headlines!

Police hunt 42 monkeys that escaped from a South Carolina research facility.

All together now: What could possibly go wrong?

As a writer, this is my answer: Everything and more!

Let's dissect this article writer-style, shall we? Bold mine.

A police search is underway after 43 monkeys escaped from a research facility in South Carolina on Wednesday night.

Police in Yemassee, Beaufort County, said the Rhesus macaque primates escaped from Alpha Genesis, a business that provides "nonhuman primate products and bio-research services," according to its website. 

 

Uh-huh. So, research animals. Check!

The monkeys were a group of "very young females" that have never been used for testing. An Alpha Genesis spokesperson confirmed to police that the animals "are too young to carry disease," according to police statement.

 

So they do primate "research services", aka testing, but 43 animals are living there rent-free without having been subject to any testing. And as far as being "too young to carry disease", we vaccinate infants. 

 

But denial of danger to the public is typical of the people in charge of the danger, and this will definitely come back to bite the spokesperson in the ass as anyone who's ever seen a movie like this knows, so...check!

"Alpha Genesis currently have eyes on the primates and are working to entice them with food," police said Thursday afternoon.

 

In other words, we got nothing. We don't control them and are hoping they get hungry enough to be dumb enough to be captured. Great plan right there. The comedic breather before the upcoming carnage. Check.

Traps have also been set up and officers are using thermal imaging cameras in an attempt to recapture the animals, police said.

 

Cue the scene where an officer is scoping out a monkey via thermal imaging, only to have another killer monkey sneak up on him and attack, dispatching him in a most gory fashion. AKA, The "Clever girl!" scene. Check!

“Residents are strongly advised to keep doors and windows secured to prevent these animals from entering homes,” Yemassee Sheriff’s Department said in a statement. 

 

Primates are smart in real life, and they're even smarter in movies. Either way you know they'll find the one point of entry you forgot to secure. Check!

 

Anyone who finds a monkey should not interact with it but instead call 911, it said. 

 

No shit, Sherlock! But for the sake of playing along, we'll have the idiot character who doesn't know the difference between domesticated pets and wild animals, only to learn the hard way he's wrong. Or it could be some chick from PETA who is just so sure she can communicate with her sister primates, who stupidly thinks that they'll understand her and bond with her, giving her the opportunity to save the day....only to learn the hard way she's wrong. But we know what happens to both of these characters - they get ripped to shreds. Lots of screaming and blood. Check!

Alpha Genesis did not immediately respond to an overnight request for comment from NBC News.

 

Evil, mad scientists stonewalling the noble media. Check!

The company secured a federal contract to run a colony of 3,500 monkeys on Morgan Island off the coast of South Carolina, also known as Monkey Island. 

 

And there's your title: Monkey Island. Also, THREE THOUSAND, FIVE HUNDRED MONKEYS??? Who thought this was a good idea. Damn, you couldn't pay me enough to work on that island.

The Post and Courier newspaper in Beaufort County reported that primate escapes have happened several times before in the area, including in May this year, and in 2016 when 19 evaded security at Alpha Genesis before they were recaptured six hours later.

In 2022, three monkeys escaped following a traffic accident in rural Pennsylvania.

 

So it's happened before? Have you learned nothing from the previous escapes? Of course not. They never do.

 

Outbreak, anyone?

This is a guy who doesn't have to write fiction - he lived an amazing story

This story popped up on Facebook and I can't believe I've never heard this man before. This is the kind of thing that sounds like a movie, but it was this guy's real life: from the United States Holocaust Memorial Museum, the story of the aptly named Arnold Braver.

Go read the post. I wish I could just copy and paste it, but that wouldn't be cool. Basically, this guy was a Jew in 1940's Germany and was captured by the German Army. Knowing being discovered as Jewish would mean death, when accused, he denied it to his captors.

At one point an officer told him to turn around and (from the FB post): Arnold refused, saying, “If you want to kill me, look me in the eye.” The officer walked away.

 

As the Allies approached and it became obvious to the German military that the war was lost, they incredibly employed Braver to save themselves. “They decided to surrender to me, provided I could give them safeguard to the American prisoner of war camp,” remembered Arnold. “They dreaded being captured by the Russians.”

 

Braver survived the war and celebrated his 101st birthday earlier this year. It does suck he had to deny his beliefs, but he also should never have been put in that position in the first place, and it did save his life. 

 

Tell me this story doesn't sound like something straight out of Hollywood. I would watch that movie. And this guy actually lived it.

 

Amazing.

Now, now, don't go giving Hollywood any ideas...

From The Babylon Bee, George Orwell's 1984 updated for the (echo voice) MODERN...AUDIENCE:

 

From the article:

"We felt like it was time to update the story to fit a modern audience," Sony producer Glen Maxwell told reporters. "After seeing how censorship and totalitarianism have grown in popularity over the past few years, we think Big Brother is probably a better protagonist than Winston Smith. Big Brother's insistence on absolute compliance fits better with current progressive ideals."

 

The more I think about it, the more the idea of a story about some Hollywood filmmakers making this exact version of 1984 because they think that's what the people want to see sounds like a great parody. Now that's movie I'd watch.

Story fodder galore!

This popped up on my Facebook feed today: 23 Shocking Secrets Revealed About People After Their Deaths. AKA 23 potential story ideas, right writers? Look at you BuzzFeed, making yourself useful!

Hey horror writers - this one showed up in my inbox this morning: You can win a scholarship to a Horror Writing Retreat in a Haunted French Castle! Talk about ambience:

 

The medieval French castle, Château Marouatte, where the Horror Retreat will be held, is a 700-year-old castle, hidden deep within ancient woodland, where British and French royalty have also stayed...

What's so haunted about it, you may ask? Well, crystals mysteriously appear in rooms overnight; coloured orbs fly around the interior of certain towers; ghostly faces appear in bathroom mirrors, and the noise of the clanking of chains being dragged across bedroom floors can be heard from time to time... what more do you need to inspire (or terrify!) you, when you're writing a Horror Script?!

Although several rooms are haunted, non-haunted rooms are also available for the faint of heart...

 

It's open to all horror writers regardless of whether you're writing a novel, screenplay, or TV pilot. Make it quick though - they're only taking applications through November 23.

 

Happy Haunting Writing!

It took me a few seconds, but YIKES!!!

And yes, as a crime writer I do reserve the right to use this in a story. Wouldn't be the first time I'd gotten story inspiration from a meme.

Via might_be_wrong on IG. Scroll down if you can't figure it out.

How do you give equal amounts of the apples with one stroke of the knife? You stab one of the people and the remaining two each get one apple. Brutal.

CSI: Sacramento

When he's not being crowned U-Haul Salesman of the Year for his role in the mass exodus of Californians worn down by Dem policies to more freedom loving states, Gavin Newsom is addressing other important issues that require his immediate attention (unlike the homeless crisis, crime, and record-high gas prices). Check this out:

 

That sound you hear is Golden State crime writers firing up their laptops. Because (all together now) what could possibly go wrong and how can I use it in a story? 

 

Kind of reminds me of this:

Thanks for the story fodder, Gavin! At least he's making himself useful to Californians for a change. 

 

Character traits

There were many qualities that made Mr. Rogers renowned as a kind, caring person, a man of immense and admirable character. One quality was his innate decency, because that was simply the kind of man he was. It was always a beautiful day in his neighborhood because he made it so. And it was clear that he dearly loved the children who watched his show. He was genuinely caring and sought to teach the most vulnerable of our society, our children.

Another thing that made him so beloved was his creative ways to deal with issues that affected members of his young audience. This image, which popped up on my Twitter feed recently, is a perfect example:

Like a good neighbor...

As I read this, I had two reactions - one was being touched by his typically sweet and creative reaction to the blind girl's letter and her dilemma. Most people would might have taken the approach that since she's blind, there's probably a lot of things she doesn't know are happening (or not happening), especially considering television is a primarily visual medium. Not Mr. Rogers. He found a solution and put it into action. And it was minimal effort for him, but probably meant the world to that little girl. It was totally a Mr. Rogers thing to do.

 

The other reaction I had is how this one simple anecdote is worth a thousand words in terms of describing what kind of man he was...and how effective this would be in establishing him as a character in a story.

 

One of the things that is difficult for writers is describing their characters without making it a drudgery for readers, or turning it into a checklist of traits, both physical and non-physical. In screenwriting you really don't get into much description that isn't absolutely necessary. FRED ROGERS, gentle, grandfatherly, 60-ish, is about all you want to put in the script when he's introduced. Even in a novel you don't want the action to grind to a halt because you have to describe to the reader that the quiet, unassuming old guy in the red cardigan is the epitome of decency and here is a list of qualities to back that up, but don't assume he's a ineffective because he's also deceptively clever when it comes to dealing with kids, all as shown by the fact that he took it upon himself to find a way to resolve this girl's issue in a way that would benefit the child. And it's so simple.

 

You could explain all that with just this one anecdote about him - that when a blind child expressed concern that she couldn't see him feed his fish and worried about the fish going hungry, he made a point of narrating the feeding so she would know the fish was okay. Because not only does the story tug at our heartstrings, but it tells the audience everything they need to know about this character without dragging it out. One simple act that is so typical of Fred Rogers and that he probably didn't make a big deal about speaks volumes about what kind of man we're seeing here. Even if you were describing him to someone who had no idea who he was, relating this simple story about him would bring them up to speed.

Legendary screenwriting instructor Syd Field said, "Action is character." For me, this quick anecdote about Mr. Rogers is a perfect example of that. Don't tell us what a character is like. Show us who he is.

From the Department of What Could Possibly Go Wrong and How Can I Use It in a Story?

 

Yeah, I'm adding this article to my writing notes, because it doesn't scream "dystopian society" AT ALL. *Sarcasm* (In case you didn't pick up on that.)

Bon Appetit shares my skepticism: Whole Foods Wants Your Handprints. What Could Possibly Go Wrong? From the article:

Jeff Bezos is one step closer to transforming your mortal bag of bones into a lean, mean, money-dispensing machine. The body part in question: Your hands. Amazon is rolling out its palm-scanning technology at more than 65 Whole Foods grocery stores in California over the coming weeks.

 

Customers can activate their palms by registering a handprint via an Amazon One kiosk or at checkout in participating stores. Along with a skin scan, you’ll need to offer a bank card, provide your phone number, and say “yes Jeff” to Amazon’s terms and conditions. Once set up, you can lug all the organic kale and age-defying collagen powder you like to checkout. You’ll hover a palm over the scanning device to pay—just as you would place a hand on the bible—then you’re good to go.

 

You need to read the whole article, because the author really isn't having any of this. And I'm not either. I remember writing checks at the checkstand, and really, it wasn't that hard. Now all we have to do is jam a credit card into a slot for a few seconds, and off we and our groceries go. Easy peasy. If that's too much of an inconvenience, I don't know what to tell you.

 

So apparently the way it works is that you give Amazon your unique handprint, they store it in the cloud or something like that, oh, and it's tied to your credit card. If that isn't a security breach begging to happen, I don't know what is.

 

Look, I like Whole Foods as much as the next person, but I'm also not keen on having my life turned into an episode of The Twilight Zone. So yeah, this one's a pass.

I feel a romcom coming on...

Coming to a theater near you!

Via _cophumor_ on Instagram.

 

From the Department of Stranger Than Fiction: Jockey Frank Hayes

Despite a lifetime as a horse-crazy girl, a large part of which was as a horse racing fan, I had never, ever heard of this guy until this post about him popped up on my social media the other day:

Frank Hayes is the only jockey to win a race while dead. No joke. He suffered a fatal heart attack during a steeplechase at Belmont Park in 1923, just after Sweet Kiss, his 20-1 longshot mount, took the lead at the head of the stretch, but his body stayed in the saddle until after the horse crossed the finish line. It was Hayes's first - and needless to say, last - win as a jockey. In fact, he's the only dead person to ever win a sporting event.

No one realized Hayes was dead until after the race. Belmont officials graciously waived the usual post-race weigh-in and because the jockey was still in the saddle when he crossed the finish line, ruled the win legit. 

You can learn more about Hayes here (and do check out the links at the bottom of that page). Stranger than fiction indeed. And you'd better believe I'm adding this to my riding writing notes. 

Stranger than fiction, indeed

Don't even get me started on Gavin Newsom. There's so many reasons Californians want him gone, so many reasons he's been terrible for the state. Maybe some other time.

However, one of the more bizarre pandemic-related things he's done is going the lottery route for people who've gotten the vaccine. Hosted by him, of course.

With that in mind, this just popped up on my social media:

Okay, I totally get what the guy who posted it is going for, but just the oddness of it all is what's been on my mind lately. So I replied with this:

Unfortunately Serling is no longer with us and hasn't been for a long, long time. But I think it says a lot about his genius that decades later he's still our go-to guy for the bizarre, especially in terms of powerful political figures (or "the state" as Rod was fond of slyly referring to them). Tell me this doesn't look like a scene out of a Serling script.

We are truly living in bizarro world, but I'm still betting on the good guys to win. I just wish that day would hurry up and get here. I'm getting kind of tired of feeling like I'm living in an episode of The Twilight Zone.

You guys, Netflix has a documentary on Bob Ross!!!

As part of their summer movie slate, Netflix will release the documentary Bob Ross: Happy Accidents, Betrayal and Greed. And I for one can't wait.

I have a feeling this won't be part of the documentary.

And yes, I did use this meme as inspiration for a story. It's one of the ones that was supposed to have been published this spring. Hopefully it will finally sees the light of day in July.

What could possibly go wrong?

Ya know, I didn't even have to open the email to question the wisdom of Amazon getting into the drug delivery service.

Click to biggify, as we used to say in the good old days.

That's right, Amazon will now drop off your prescription drugs right on your doorstep. And, apparently, leave them there.

Yep, delivered to your door.

That sound you just heard? Why that was your friendly neighborhood porch pirates rejoicing like their team just won the Super Bowl. Because it did.

Gotta question the legality of drop-off prescription druggies, but since Amazon rules the world, I guess they can do what they like. Can't wait to hear the stories that come out of this development. Or the ones that are written with this scenario as part of the plot. Because, I could totally use this in a story.

Department of Crime Writer Humor: Home Edition

I haven't resorted to this yet, but maybe I should...

And if that wasn't funny enough, there was this response:

Ain't technology grand?

Busted!!!

You bet I'm saving this for a story!

H/T to WeirdWorld on Instagram.

Loss Prevention

As I mentioned in this post, I haven't been doing much writing so far this year, and since the move last Monday I've been unpacking and setting up the beautiful new apartment. This afternoon I had the first "I could use this in a story" experience that I've had in a long, long time. 

At my new local Pavilions they have two entrances (one on either end of the store) and because of the lockdown have designated one door for entering only and the other for exiting only. As I was entering, a woman was coming out of the same doorway with a full cart. She had a bunch of stuff, including a couple cases of dog food and most notably four very large bottles of tequila. The cart got stuck on the door track and I assumed she was just having trouble pushing the cart over it, so I stepped back to give her room. Just then a guy came up behind her and I assumed he was going to assist her. That's not what happened.

The guy told her "nice try" and she proceeded to stride away into the parking lot. It turns out the guy was an employee and he was holding a device that locked the cart as she was trying to leave with a cartful of groceries she hadn't paid for. They didn't go after her, and the guy and another female employee who was stationed at the door seemed almost amused at the brazen attempt.

Once I realized what had just happened, I was shocked that someone would try to just waltz out of the store with stolen items and not even panic when caught. I asked the female employee, "People actually do that?" Her response: "All day long."

I'm thinking loss prevention might be a bit more exciting job than people realize. Years ago, at a Guitar Center, one of the employees told me a story about a guy who tried to steal an $11,000 guitar by shoving the neck down one of his pant legs, then covering the body with his shirt. And then he tried to nonchalantly walk stiff-legged out of the store. People are crazy. And stupid.

Crime Writer Humor: HGTV edition

Or maybe Oxygen...

"Days of Crimes and Roses" on Oxygen! There ya go. Make sure I get my producer/created by credits.

No joke, this exists: You can get married at a Taco Bell

And yes, of course, it's in Las Vegas.

For $600 you get:

Includes, among other things, a sauce packet garter and bow-tie,
sauce packet bouquet (which is a loaner, in case you need something
borrowed), t-shirts, a 12-pack of tacos, and a Cinnabon cake.

Taco Bell Chihuahua not included.

Look, I love their greasy food as much as the next person. I'm not even going to try and be a food snob about this - there's something in their meat sauce and mild sauce that is like crack to me. But I don't think even I could get drunk enough to get married in a Taco Bell, even if it's legit. Not to mention for $600 I'm going to want a lot more than 12 measly tacos, and I'll be taking that sauce packet bouquet home with me, thank you very much.

This almost makes getting hitched by an Elvis impersonator look like a legit decision made by sober adults serious about the sanctity of marriage.

And don't think I won't use this in a story someday, because I totally will.

However, to each his own, live and let live, yadda yadda yadda. So if you would actually like to get married in a Taco Bell (which no one will ever judge you for) you can check out the deets at Taco Bell Wedding.

Story fodder for us writers, nightmare fuel for the rest of you

A couple years ago at Writers' Police Academy, we were told that law enforcement is already availing themselves to DNA in the possession of companies like Ancestry.com and 23andMe. After all, who doesn't want to help catch a bad guy and put them away? Plus, you really don't have a choice when presented with a warrant, which I would guess is all or most of the time.

Now comes this news: 75% of Ancestry.com has been sold to Blackstone Group, an asset management company. This includes access to Ancestry's DNA database, which probably isn't what customers had in mind when they submitted their genetic profile to the company. There's also this (from the linked article):

It (Ancestry.com) has also branched out to genomics, this month launching a screening service designed to test individuals' risk of developing inheritable health conditions such as heart disease, breast cancer and colon cancer, according to the Financial Times.

Again, I'm guessing that the people who signed up for this service did so thinking that their personal information wouldn't be shareable, much less up for grabs to the highest bidder. It's probably in the fine print, but still...

I'm wondering who will be the first to publish a novel or sell a script based on this news. I don't care how many precautions are taken, there's always a way around them if you're diabolical enough. So much potential for blackmail! So much potential for framing someone dumb enough to have thought their genetic information would be safe and private! It's kind of amazing to think that this business transaction may have just opened up a whole new sub-genre for mysteries and thrillers.

Also, imagine you're a defense lawyer whose client has used these services. Would it really be all that hard to convince a jury that the accused's DNA could have been planted, given that it can be bought and sold? Remember that they don't have persuade all twelve jurors - just one with reasonable doubt hangs the whole jury. You know it's just a matter of time before some slimeball lawyer who knows damn well his client is guilty gives it a shot. How would you write that story?

Plus, on top of the DNA aspect, you now have the genomics thing. Seriously, the idea that someone (say, someone angling to be potential heir or just someone with a big fat grudge who wants to make the victim's life miserable) could fake a notification from the company and lead someone to believe that they're dying (or at least in danger of dying) from a dreaded disease they already assume themselves to be susceptible to? People can get really paranoid about their mortality and it's just a short step from there to prey on that abject fear. As an idea, especially a story idea, it's really not that far-fetched.

I just decided to print out this post and add it to my writing notebook, because the story possibilities, they just boggle the mind. They really do.

Updated 9/15/20: Looks like I'm a little late to the party - Michael Connelly's recent best-seller Fair Warning covered that exactly and is now headed for the big screen. From Deadline:

The murder mystery is set around the rapidly evolving 'wild west' world of DNA sequence data harvesting; specifically in regard to such data being sold for profit within an industry that has no oversight. It delves into the murky moral questions raised by companies promising to show customers their ancestries, while quietly attaining the right to do whatever they desire with the acquired DNA data-and the potentially deadly ramifications of such personal information falling into the wrong hands. 

Gotta be quick, kids.