Utterly classless

Late night host buffoon Jimmy Kimmel apparently thought it would be fun to mock someone whose house burned to the ground because he doesn't like the guy's politics. This is a perfect example of why late night shows are dying. 

 

Spencer Pratt ran for mayor of Los Angeles and was hugely embraced across demographics. The videos he ran on social media were off the charts amazing and should be studied by future candidates. Whether or not Pratt lost the vote legitimately is another conversation. For now I'll just say California never had these issues when we voted in person. Both California and Los Angeles politics are absolutely corrupt and like many here, I have little to no faith in the security of our elections these days. I do think it would have been interesting to have seen what Pratt could have accomplished in the role of mayor. A lot of people seem unaware of this, but he has a degree in political science from USC, so he's not as unqualified as many seem to have assumed or claimed.

 

Pratt has said he'd leave the city if he lost the election and I have to say I don't blame the guy. After all, it isn't like he has a house to come home to here now. It burned to the ground in the Palisades Fire, which is a whole other issue in terms of if that had to be as bad as it was, and who might bear responsibility for that.

 

But the point is that Jimmy Kimmel, his producers, and his writing staff thought this would be hilarious:

 

“I know things might be tight right now, especially with the out-of-state donation money running out,” Kimmel said during his monologue. “Moving is expensive, so to help you out we rented you a U-Haul. Our staff spent the whole day decorating for you, and everybody will notice you and wave goodbye as you leave.” 

 

The image shared by Kimmel shows Pratt appearing to cry, plastered across a U-Haul with the phrase, “Just defeated.” 

 

This is what passes for "comedy" on network TV these days. But what Kimmel and company forgot in their cruel glee is that Spencer doesn't need a U-Haul to move. Why? Oh, yeah...

 

 

Oh right, the thing that prompted Pratt to get involved in local politics in the first place - he lost his home in the Palisades Fire! It wasn't that long ago, Jimmy. Nobody local has forgotten about it. It hasn't faded into the past. Heck, there's a family who lost their home in the Palisades now living just a couple doors down from my apartment. They're all over the place. And Jimmy Kimmel thought it was acceptable to poke fun at these victims. I wonder if he'd volunteer to provide U-Haul's for the other 6,836 families that lost their homes. Also, twelve people died in this fire. I'm sure Jimmy will eventually get around to making them fodder for his "comedy".  Maybe his staff could mockingly decorate some hearses for them.

 

Honestly, if I ran ABC, I'd yank him off the air for this and not let him back on until he made a sincere, on-camera apology. The 2025 Palisades and Altadena fires and the lack of rebuilding support has traumatized not just the victims in those communities, but all of Los Angeles and it's not a wound that's going to heal anytime soon. Kimmel's mockery of a victim of this is just disgusting.

 

Full California Post article is here.

Famous (and not so famous) idiots in the news

Hollywood people are so full of themselves.

 

Andrew Garfield - Dude, relax. No one in the real world cares what you watch. Watch something, don't watch it, we don't care. It doesn't affect us. It's yours. We have ours. The whole reason for this story is he doesn't want to be canceled in the industry for watching something by an author that the so-called tolerant industry hate right now because she won't walk in lockstep with their beliefs and won't be silenced. Which leads us to...

 

Josh Duhamel - "Because I respect their views on things but I'm not going to preach to them." Holy moly, this guy gets it. But wait, there's more! "They can believe what they want to believe. I'm just here to, you know, make cool stuff." Nailed it, but I wonder how much of a backlash he's going to get within the industry for not sticking to the script. 

 

Going back to Garfield, referring to J.K. Rowling - author of the Harry Potter series and one of the most successful authors in the world - as "she who shall remain nameless" isn't as clever as he thinks it is. How about this take, Andrew: Are you not saying her name because of her opinions on certain topics (which, whether or not you agree, she's entitled to have)? Or are you belittling a woman? Are you a misogynist? Down with your patriarchy! 

 

Or are you dismissing the writer as beneath you because you're a big Hollywood star and don't have to acknowledge the little people? Are writers just schmucks with Underwoods to you, big shot?

 

Also, did Hollywood ever give back the billions of dollars they made off Rowling's creations? Come on, show up how outraged you really are about her opinions and cleanse yourself of her filthy money! 

 

Laura Benanti (Who? Yeah, me too) makes an ass of herself when a group of teen theater kids didn't recognize her on a plane flight. Apparently she's trying to walk it back as down to earth self-mocking, but if she's such a great actress wouldn't that have come across in the first place? In her defense, she's a successful (if not recognizable) actress, with tons of credits and a Tony Award. Unfortunately, it's now her performance as a big shot who gets pissy over not being hailed by the little people is what a whole lot of people find the most memorable.

  

There have been a lot of memorable responses to the original video, but this was my favorite:

 

Typical politicians

Do as we say, not as we do. Also, billionaires are evil (not us, the other ones). 

 

Jerks.

 

I can't believe people actually fall for this.

Royal Pains: This time it's personal

Like many people I've watched the truly impressive train wreck that has been the Prince Harry and Meghan Markle Show in the years since they split with the British royal family with a litany of complaints about the unfairness of their royal, privileged lives. I've previously blogged my feelings and observations here, here, and here.

 

Since then, they've had one fiasco after another. I don't need to get into all of them, but here's just a few examples: A failed podcast, a failed launch of a line of lifestyle products, a failed polo show, a much derided trailer for an upcoming cooking and lifestyle show that nobody asked for, a faked Princess Diana-style dangerous car chase, as well as numerous personal appearances that reeked of a desperate need for attention and fell flat every time.

Then, the other day, they showed up at the site of the recent and absolutely devastating Eaton Fire in Altadena. You know, to raise awareness in case there's anyone left who is unaware of the fiery hellscape that has been Los Angeles the past couple of weeks.

 

They spent all of 17 minutes making an appearance to show their concern (with cameras in tow, of course) before going out on a brief tour of burned out parts of Altadena that actual residents have not been allowed into yet (with cameras in tow, of course).

Residents haven't even been allowed back in yet (I know because I know one of them) yet these two idiots are allowed in to tramp all over the wreckage of countless lives so they can "assess" the need. You know who didn't need to personally "assess" the need with a camera crew in tow? These idiots. Thousands of Angelenos began donating food, water, clothing, and money before the fires were even out. We didn't need their royal lownesses to bring this need to our attention.

How do you think it made the victims feel that their tragedy was turned into a D-list celebrity photo op? I know I'd be livid if these self-important twits were walking through the wreckage of my former home, possibly damaging or destroying what little is left to salvage.

Also, I partially blame Victor Gordo, the mayor of Pasadena, who conducted the tour. Really, should he be wasting his time with this crap, giving celebs a tour of the carnage? You can't tell me he doesn't have more pressing issues at the moment. He should have told them to piss off and find a way to actually make themselves useful.

Then, Justine Bateman got on social media and rightfully ripped them as ambulance chasers and disaster tourists, and called their photo op repulsive. Check, check, and check. And then Meghan doubled down by showing up at a collection center the next day to hand out some more useless hugs and get more photo ops.

 

A number of celebrities have been shown helping out in a variety of ways, but they've actually been helping out, not "making an appearance" (with cameras in tow, of course).

Repulsive is right. As an Angeleno (who is fortunately not in a fire area) I find it ghoulish that they're exploiting this tragedy, something that will take us years to recover from. It's been mind-boggling how everything Harry and Meghan have touched since leaving the British Royal Family turns to shit, but just when you think they can't sink any lower, they prove me wrong. I wonder how much public mockery (and they're getting a lot of it, not just from Justine) it will take to get their useless selves out of the public eye, but apparently we haven't reached that rock-bottom yet. But I hope it's soon. It's one thing to make yourself look ridiculous trying to be a big-shot producer when you have no creativity or talent to offer, but it's another thing entirely to exploit victims of a tragedy the way they have with Altadena. 

Too bad we can't deport them back to England, but I don't think the Brits want them back.

It's Pandermonium!!!

South Park took on the panderverse and it's pandermonium! 

 

Stan, Kyle, Cartman, Kenny, panderverse-style

While not quite as perfect as the firing-on-all-cylinders Worldwide Privacy Tour episode from earlier this year, this "special event" zeroed in unerringly on most of its targets. Some of the absolute winners in this episode:

• First of all this: the South Park/Disney logo mash-up. This cracked me up.

• The woke recasting of every single South Park character, with not only the boys recast as empowered women of color, but also Butters' dad, Mr. Garrison, the police chief, and the proprietor of City Wok recast the same as well.

• Cartman not only as a black woman, but also as evil alternate-universe Kathleen Kennedy.

• Grinding Hollywood in general (and Disney in particular) about recasting long-beloved characters as different from the originals, then doubling-down when fans object.

• We also got an appearance from Bob Iger, but only got to see The Boss in a picture. I've heard this may not be the last time South Park takes on Disney, and with Steamboat Willie-era Mickey Mouse going into the public domain in 2024, who knows what Matt and Trey have planned for the House of Mouse in future episodes.
  

• Look what they've done to our City Wok:  

"Shitty Woke, take order prease!"

The subplot in which uneducated handymen become Elon Musk-levels of wealthy because none of the other men in South Park - all college educated professionals who have become dependent on AI for daily tasks - are able to perform basic chores like repairing an oven door, fixing heaters, assembling catapults, and repairing broken windows was pretty sweet, although I really wish that they were just doing actual seasons with double-digit episodes on Comedy Central, because this could have simply been broken up into two terrific regular episodes. (NOTE: see update about this storyline below).

At the end, the episode did extend a bit of an olive branch in that Cartman admitted that his 10,000+ complaints per day about woke casting may have been overkill, but I think it was a bit of a hollow victory for cartoon Kathleen Kennedy. The most loathsome character in the show admits that behaving excessively was excessive behavior isn't as much of a victory lap as it may have seemed, IMO. You know who doesn't have to apologize for his objection to recasting? Kyle. His complaints, legitimate rather than excessive, aren't rendered invalid, and I think that aspect may slyly escape some viewers.

All in all, worth the six bucks to re-up with Paramount+ for a month. There's a few other things I want to check out on the service: a really well-reviewed documentary on the Milli Vanilli scandal, and a second season of Beavis & Butthead. Then I'll probably opt out again until the next time South Park decides to eviscerate the entertainment industry.

UPDATED 5:18pm: This episode of Clownfish TV on YouTube posits that the handyman storyline was a jab at the striking writers and actors who feel special and therefore don't want to consider real jobs, while blaming AI for taking their jerbs, while the handymen are the below-the-line workers who can adjust to demands of the real world and get jobs outside the industry if they have to. I like it.

Showbiz roundup

In no particular order:

 

Dear Harry and Meghan: It's not an Emmy "snub" if your program was trash, a chunk of the viewership only subjected themselves to it to rip it in YouTube videos, and you're going broke because you really have nothing to offer to the world other than an accident of birth and shameless (albeit admittedly impressive) gold-digging/social climbing skills. The podcast sucked too, oh, and the word you were looking for was stereotypes, not archetypes. Maybe you shouldn't have tried to make a career out of trashing your families. Neither of you are special. Now go away. Also, future Queen Catherine is a goddess.

 

How to not read the room: After losing hundreds of millions of dollars and millions of viewers on woke flicks like Lightyear, Elemental, The Little Mermaid, and Indiana Jones 5 you would think Disney might have learned something about what audiences want and even more importantly, don't want. Nope! YellowFlash 2 on YouTube breaks it down.

As seen on DailyMail.com:

Snow Something.

1 Dwarf and 6 Somethings.

"The Multi-ethnic Portland Hipsters" (at 1:15). 🤣

The actors are on strike too!!! Where oh where will we get our crappy reboots/reimaginings? I'm not saying the studios aren't making ridiculous amounts of money off writers and actors and I'm also not saying that as co-creators they (especially writers) don't deserve a significant piece of that pie. In fact, even with its huge box office losses, Disney has extended Bob Iger's tenure as CEO (WHY???), so studios clearly have money to burn. But these things never seem to go well for the people put out of work for an extended period of time. I guess we'll see, but I think this is just going to be really ugly.
 

How about some good news for a change? It appears Oppenheimer, which opens July 21, is every bit as great as I was hoping. I've been eagerly awaiting this film since the first trailer dropped. To get an idea of just what amazing filmmaking this is, check out this video, which explains not only some of the technical aspects, but also the one hundred day theatrical window that director Christopher Nolan demanded - and got - from Universal. I hadn't heard about this and think it's fantastic. Things need to change in Hollywood and hopefully this will be the start of it.

May Words of Wisdom

No day in life is a dress rehearsal, so every day is worthy of our best china. --Rachel Ashwell

Being challenged in life is inevitable, being defeated is optional. --Roger Crawford

 

People try to do all sorts of clever and difficult things to improve life instead of doing the simplest, easiest thing - refusing to participate in activities that make life bad. --Leo Tolstoy

 

There is absolutely no reason for being rushed along with the rush. Everybody should be free to go slow. --Robert Frost

All your life long you are slowly turning into a heavenly creature or a hellish creature: Each of us at each moment is progressing to the one state or the other. --C.S. Lewis

 

The reason we feel alienated is because the society is infantile, trivial, and stupid. So the cost of this society is a certain level of alienation. --Terence McKenna 

 

Don't tell me to ride a bus and turn down my thermostat, when you're all running around in jets and Cadillacs. --Hank Williams, Jr.

And now, a couple of palate cleansers:

My grandkids always beat me at Rock Band. And I say, "Listen, you may beat me at Rock Band, but I made the original records, so shut up." --Paul McCartney

 

If Lizzo is so beautiful, why do women get mad any time I tell them, "You look like Lizzo."? --Jeff Dye

 

That coveted blue check

I personally don't care about a Twitter blue verification check, but I'm also not part of the celebrity elite who like everyone to know how special they are. Also, I've heard it's $8 per month, not $5. But either way, we can't have our poor celebrities going broke to keep their blue checks. Case in point:

Imagine having LeBron money and not wanting to fork out $5 a month for a verified account. Poor baby.

I just thought the responses were funny. Because, yeah.

Ladies and gentleman, the leader of the free world. If by free world, you mean clown world.

No joke. This is the text of Joe Biden's remarks on the school shooting in Nashville. I transcribed it myself, but you can see it here via ABC News starting at the 6:45 mark. It was like watching the guy warming up an audience for the headliner. How someone could joke and laugh at a time like this is inexplicable to me. Just sickening.

Applause. Biden at podium, smiling.

 

BIDEN: My name is Joe Biden.

 

AUDIENCE: Laughter.

 

BIDEN: I'm Dr. Jill Biden's husband

AUDIENCE: Laughter.

BIDEN: And I eat Jeni's ice cream, chocolate chip.

AUDIENCE: Laughter.

BIDEN: I came down because I heard there was chocolate chip ice cream.

AUDIENCE: Laughter.

BIDEN: By the way, I have a whole refrigerator full upstairs. 

AUDIENCE: Laughter

BIDEN (Grinning): You think I'm kidding? I'm not. Ben, how are you pal? One of the best guys in the United States Congress, Ben Cardin.

 

AUDIENCE: Whoops and applause.

BIDEN: Folks, uh, welcome to the White House. It's a delight to have you all here. And who are those cool looking kids back there? 

AUDIENCE: Laughter.

BIDEN: They're your kids, all four of 'em? Well stand up, guys.

KIDS STAND.

AUDIENCE: Applause.

 

BIDEN: Well, I want you to know, like you, I had two brothers, there were three in our family, three brothers, and one sister. My sister is smarter than all of us. 

 

AUDIENCE: Laughter.

 

BIDEN: Not a joke, she used to be three years younger than me, now she's twenty-three years younger than me.  

AUDIENCE: Laughter.

BIDEN: Yeah, she managed every one of my campaigns for office, even back when I was in high school. We went to the same university two years apart, she graduated with honors, I graduated.

AUDIENCE: Laughter.

BIDEN: And we had a simple rule in the family: listen to Val. 

AUDIENCE: Laughter.

BIDEN: My sister Valerie's incredible, so guys, be nice to your sister, your gonna need her. You're gonna need her, I promise. It's the same lineup. (POINTS) You're the oldest? Who's number two? (KID RAISES HAND) Number two? Who's number three? (KID RAISES HAND). You're twins, are you guys twins? (UNINTELLIGIBLE) Okay, alright, this is how it was in our outfit. Well, I'm so glad to see you all, thanks for coming with mom, okay? Gotta take care of your mom. Dad's are much harder to raise, but you know...

AUDIENCE: Laughter.

BIDEN: Before I begin to speak, the reason I spent a little time with the kids, I just wanted to speak very briefly about the school shooting in Nashville, Tennessee...

Yes, two minutes and twenty seconds into his Comedy Store audition, he finally wants to speak very briefly about the school shooting. What a leader. And no, I don't care what was already scheduled, if you're the president, you don't joke around when something terrible has happened. I just don't know how someone can yuck it up when they're about to discuss something so awful. I came down here because chocolate chip ice cream. Jesus Christ.

Also, notice they turned off comments on the Biden video? Guessing I wasn't the only person appalled and offended by the jokester approach to a national tragedy.

We deserve better.

Behold the meme of memes!!!

I don't know where this originated, but I've been seeing it all over the interwebs today. And the craziest part is...IT'S TRUE!!! I mean, just imagine...

Heck, forget 1990, try the 1980's. In case you're too young to remember:

I guess there's something to be said for aging naturally and therefore gracefully. Says the girl woman who still gets the gray roots colored every month. But there's really nothing else to say except well done, Roseanne.

Look, I'm not unsympathetic. Getting old sucks. You don't look like the you that you feel like anymore. God knows I'm proof of that. You look at that number and can't relate to it. I get it. But what I don't get is butchering yourself and cultivating a look so unnatural that people freak out at the sight of you. And on top of that, thinking you look so great that you flaunt yourself all over the internet. Sorry you can't look like your 1980's self anymore, but who does? And it's even more impressive if Roseanne's had some work done, because she still looks like a normal, older woman. If she's had work, it was well done and she didn't overdo it. 

Seriously, if they had Oscars for memes, this one just swept all categories.

 

Don't piss on my leg and tell me it's raining

Gotta admit, I'm sick to death of listening to Biden talking about how he's rescued the country from the "disaster" it was when he inherited it. (Spoiler alert - he wrecked it, not whoever he's blaming it on this week. Don't care about your political party or who you voted for - this is recent.)

Gas prices in Southern California are back above $5/gallon, after a period of them going down. Not down to pre-Biden levels, but at least not in the $5+ range. That didn't last. Oh, and a bank just crashed and there's a good chance that starting tomorrow the stock market is going to do the same. Peachy.

Prices of everything are going up. I don't know how people are surviving, especially those that have to commute to work (1 hour+ one-way isn't unusual here in L.A.) and provide for children. The closest thing I have to a kid is the lovely Sophie, and even she's getting expensive. Case in point:

Yeah, there's cheaper cat food, but Sophie is old and has gotten picky as heck in her old age. In fact, if she'd eat the even more expensive specialty food for kidney disease that she rejected, I'd pay for that too. But I'm also not in the position of having to decide between feeding kids or the family pet, so I'll take the hit and she'll continue to get the fancy-schmancy stuff.

Anyhoo, this box of twelve servings has always been in the $11-$12 range, depending on where I buy it (Target, Walmart, or a grocery store). About a week ago I was at CVS and it was priced at a jaw-dropping $22. Not making that up. TWENTY. TWO. DOLLARS. I probably should have taken a picture, but I was too stunned by that number to think about it.

So instead I went over to Pavilions where I was sure it would be a lot more reasonably priced. Not, as it turns out. I was shocked to see what they were charging. Not as bad as the $22 CVS wanted, but the price has skyrocketed at the grocery store as well. EIGHTEEN DOLLARS.

 

"Regular" price. There's nothing "regular" about it.

The only thing that brought it down to close to the old price was being a "member". Otherwise, nearly twenty bucks. For twelve servings. She'll go through that in well under a week.

And that's just cat food. See that Diet Dr. Pepper? Next time I bought it (at Ralphs) it was nearly $4. For one 2-liter bottle. Looks like I'm going to have to think about giving up the luxury of soda like the good peasant I am. You know who isn't having to concern themselves with prices or sacrifices? Know who isn't worried about feeding their families and pets? You know who isn't going to be eating the food made out of bugs? Our political overlords and their fellow elite, that's who.

It's galling enough to watch the world fall apart around me, but I don't need the insult of our so-called "leaders" telling us how much better it all is than a few years ago. I mean, isn't going broke, a stock market crash, and the looming possibility of World War III so much better than a booming economy with record-low Black and Hispanic unemployment? Depends on who you ask. If you ask me, the answer is HELL NO. But there are politicians (and let's not forget the complicit media) who will look you in the eye and tell you everything is dandy. Because they have nothing but disdain for you and don't care what happens to you. And some of you will still continue to support them. I don't know how or where this is going to end, but it's looking pretty dire right now. Forget the concept of a dystopian future. That future is now. We're in it.

Sophie will be fine, but I'm now wondering when we're going to see stories about people having to give up their pets to shelters because they can no longer afford to feed them and the kids, and well, they can't very well drop the kids off.

Update: Did I call it or what? In December, I received a call from the Pasadena Humane Society (who I have donated to in the past) asking for donations for a program they have to provide food for pet owners who are experiencing financial difficulties so that they can keep them rather than having to give them up.

In a nutshell

Present day journalism summed up in one simple little illustration:

Via thenewcounterculture on IG.

The utter brilliance of "The Worldwide Privacy Tour" - It's funny because it's true.

So South Park decided to take on Prince Harry and Meghan Markle, and it was glorious!

It's been almost a week since what is, in my opinion, the best South Park episode since the pitch-perfect gentrification season. I've been wanting to blog about it, but the story keeps expanding, so every time I thought it was safe to hit "publish", more news would come out. But it's time. Let's go!

 

#1 - The episode itself.

The overall reaction is that this is one of the best episodes of South Park in years. Agreed. This episode was an embarrassment of riches. The dirty looks when they entered the cathedral for the Queen's funeral, culminating in the "Earl of Halifax" farting on the stupid wife (Is it even really South Park without fart jokes?) The world's greatest candle. The title of the "memoir" - it's called "WAAAGH", and how absolutely perfect was the delivery of that line? 

 

 

We see them flying all over the world in a private jet, which eventually gets parked in front of their new house in...not Montecito. In South Park, right across the street from Kyle, who is not happy to see them. The amazing attention to detail in the magazine covers which are only onscreen a few seconds (The Royal Rogue did a great cover-by-cover review on YouTube - it starts around the 5:50 mark). 

 

The cartoon frozen "todger" (apparently British slang for johnson). Seriously, dudes, for future reference, when writing your autobiographies there is no need to wax poetic about your bad boy and the trouble it brings. The madness of branding and how phony it is ("The problem with you is you want the results without doing the work.") Nice touch: each brand's list of attributes included "victim". The empty-headed echo chamber. And the fact that they were never identified by name, and yet no one, and I mean NO. ONE. has expressed any doubt as to who inspired this episode.

I also loved the Beatlesque Worldwide Privacy Tour logo, which is now the background on my social media accounts.

Missing: Elizabeth Arden. Harry's bald spot. The single, left-eyed tear. But not to fear, there may be future episodes featuring the Prince and Princess of Canada. God knows there's plenty more ridiculousness to be mined. It's only a half-hour show, they could only fit so much into one episode.

Lone whiff: The Queen in her coffin without a lid on it. Not cool. Not sure what the point of that was.

The episode was ultimately sympathetic to Harry, which I used to be. Initially I saw him as a besotted clod who was thinking with the wrong head. But after hearing multiple excerpts from his autobiography "Waaagh!", I mean "Spare", he revealed himself as a bitter, petty, boring, self-absorbed jerk with no appreciation for the unimaginable wealth and privilege he's spent his entire life in thanks to a mere accident of birth, and someone who is absolutely devoid of even the smallest shred of self-awareness. In his own way, he's as unpleasant as his grasping, entitled, gold-digger, and at this point equally culpable in the abuse they have heaped on his family, her family, the British people, and pretty much anyone who doesn't think they're the greatest things in the world.

Contrast the depiction of Meghan - I mean the Princess of Canada - in this episode with the description of the Princess of Canada in "Royal Pudding", which was inspired by the wedding of Prince William and Catherine Middleton as the bride walked down the aisle: "Isn't she ravishing, so pure of heart, so strong in body, so hot in the face. She is indeed the living symbol of our great country. My God, she's beautiful." That's a long way from the hollow vessel that is the younger Prince of Canada's "Instagram-loving bitch wife".

#2: Public reaction

Like I mentioned earlier, this episode has received pretty much unanimous acclaim. I've yet to see anyone comment about it without raving and laughing about it. However, it seems there are a couple of people who weren't so impressed. Guess who!

#3: Pre-emptive strike attempt 

Prince Harry apparently tried to get the episode blocked! And was ignored! I was actually surprised to hear this. I hadn't heard a thing about it until they released the trailer just days before the episode aired. Apparently The Spare is a fan of censorship, as long as it doesn't extend to him blabbing about family members he knows can't respond publicly.

 

#4: Victimhood!!!

It's like the Underpants Gnomes: Step 1: Fuck up. Step 2: Get skewered by South Park. Step 3: Play the Victim! Just like it said on the show! Some people just never learn. They are actually having their lawyers looking into suing over the episode. I love how they blab unpleasant and personal stuff about other people, but fire up the legal system the minute there's a peep about them. Hypocrites. I'm no law student, but I'm pretty sure they can't sue for satire. 

Nope, not just me.

 

Yeah, Meghan never struck me as someone who has a sense of humor about herself. I do wonder, how can one be "upset and overwhelmed" by something they claim not to have seen? Riiiiight. Let me guess, it's only okay when she and Harry publicly trash people.

 

I also love how Matt & Trey haven't said a word in response to all this. It's like they're taking a page out of the Royal Family's playbook - don't give the immature brats the satisfaction of a reaction. Let your actions speak.

South Park is a natural friggin' treasure. Also, fun factoid: South Park Studios is located just a few miles from where I live. Kinda makes you proud.

Matt & Trey vs. Harry & Meghan

I know who my money's on.

 

 

"Worldwide Privacy Tour". Heh.

 

Here's the too-brief trailer. We're going to have to wait until Wednesday night to see the whole royal smackdown.

 

"Some dumb prince and his stupid wife." South Park speaks for us all.

 

He is the boss. You are the peons. Pay up. Or don't, he doesn't care.

Backstreets, the long-time Bruce Springsteen fanzine, has shuttered in protest over astronomic ticket prices for Springsteen's current tour. Aw, that's cute. You guys thought someone insanely rich and famous cared about you, the little people. Adorbs.

That was mean. I do feel for his fans. They've been devoted and bought into the "everyman" mystique for decades. Backstreets began publishing in 1980 and has been kept going ever since by the fans, for the fans, meaning a lot of people put forty years of time and effort into creating and supporting something in honor of someone they admired and probably in many cases, idolized. And guess what The Boss himself has to say about the pricing? From the Deadline article linked above:

Springsteen himself made no apologies for the rising prices. He told Rolling Stone that he typically told his handlers to align ticket prices with what “everybody else is doing,” then charge a little less.

But that changed. “This time I told them, ‘Hey, we’re 73 years old. The guys are there. I want to do what everybody else is doing, my peers.’ So that’s what happened. That’s what they did…. I know it was unpopular with some fans, but if there’s any complaints, they can have your money back.” 

Unpopular??? How nice. How about betrayed? We all know that that last statement is basically, "If you don't like it, stuff it. Stay home. Keep your filthy peasant money. I don't need it." And if that doesn't sting enough Springsteen faithful, keep in mind it's coming from a man with a net worth of about $650 million. He owns multiple homes. His daughter rides horses that cost more than some of his fans annual income. He hasn't been an "everyman", but a rich, famous celebrity for many, many years. Decades. A lifetime.

I went on TicketMaster to check out tickets and initially it looked like, at least in some venues, you can get in for a decent price if you buy the tickets directly from them, assuming you do it early on. But TicketMaster also has what it refers to as "Verified Resale", which is a boatload of the seats that aren't available for the venue's prices, and that's when the prices start to skyrocket into the high hundreds and even thousands of dollars. There's also something called dynamic pricing which seems to be involved in jacking up prices. Plus, they're selling tickets for seating behind the stage, which to me seems the epitome of greed. Who they hell wants to watch a concert from behind the stage? And some of those seats are a couple hundred dollars. That's crazy.

Oh, and let's also add in the fact that at least in the U.S. the economy is in the toilet, costs of basic needs like groceries, gas, and electricity have skyrocketed, and our dollars are worth way less than they were even a couple years ago. I can tell you from personal experience that many people don't have the expendable income, or faith in our financial situation and future to feel comfortable spending chunks of money that we would have, a couple of years ago. Just a friendly reminder not to vote for someone just because your favorite rock star told you to.

Apparently this kerfuffle started last July, when Backstreets published a piece called "Freeze-Out" about the sky-high ticket prices that included comments like this:

We're feeling old, listening to the outcries of fans feeling similarly betrayed by last week's ticket sales, and remembering that things were different a decade ago.

...when Ticketmaster's first U.S. onsales for the 2023 Tour left many Bruce Springsteen fans in a state of shocked disbelief.

 From our point of view, this so-called premium, algorithm-driven model violates an implicit contract between Bruce Springsteen and his fans, one in which the audience side of the equation appeared to truly matter...We believed it because he told us repeatedly it was true. 

Bruce Springsteen tickets have been historically and notoriously difficult to obtain. That's the nature of the beast, with so many wanting to witness the power and the glory of rock 'n' roll, and relatively few seats to hold them. But the issue has rarely been the money.

But the ideals of Springsteen's music put forward - they're still alive, aren't they? ...If one can't say yes - if only for a few hours every so often - then maybe the magic really is just tricks. 

Springsteen has been paid a king's ransom, and we've never begrudged him that, either. Not the reported $500 million sale of his life's work, which hardly fazed us, not the Broadway prices, not the Jeep commercial. We believe in the value of his music, his work; those other transactions and the arenas in which they take place feel beyond out purview. 

My research apparently didn't even scratch the surface - Backstreets included this image at the end of the post:

Jaysus. I can see why they're feeling crushed.

Just below this image is a post entitled "Dynamic Pricing: A Fucking Shitshow" if you want to learn more about that. I don't, this post is about the fans and the artist, not the business side of things. But apparently this is a tool to potentially jack up the cost to fans and in many cases, price them out.

It looks like Bruce feels secure enough in his financial security and legendary rock God status to not even work up the appearance of righteous indignation on behalf of the faithful. His response, via Rolling Stone? The aforementioned "keep your money" comment. Also, it looks like Deadline did a little bit of creative editing on his comments - here's how they actually read in RS (bold mine):

This time I told them, “Hey, we’re 73 years old. The guys are there. I want to do what everybody else is doing, my peers.” So that’s what happened. That’s what they did [laughs].

This is what's known as laughing all the way to the bank. I'm sure his devoted, long-time fans see the humor in that and hilarity will ensue.

But if there’s any complaints on the way out, you can have your money back.

Sure you can. Good luck getting your refund from TicketMaster or any of its "Verified Resellers" after the fact. He's basically telling his fans to pound sand.

All of which has led Backstreets to this. Some excerpts:

If you read the editorial Backstreets published last summer in the aftermath of the U.S. ticket sales, you have a sense of where our heads and hearts have been: dispirited, downhearted, and yes, disillusioned. It's not a feeling we're at all accustomed to while anticipating a new Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band tour.

Judging by the letters we've received over recent months, the friends and longtimers we've been checking in with, and the response to our editorial, disappointment is a common feeling among hardcore fans in the Backstreets community. 

When I revisit that writing now, it reads like a cry for help; most discouraging was that six month went by with no lifeline thrown.

These are concerts that we can hardly afford; that many of our readers cannot afford; and that a good portion of our readership has lost interest in as a result. (Bold mine - keep in mind these are some of Springsteen's most ardent, long-term fans.)

Whatever the eventual asking price at showtime and whether an individual buyer finds it fair, we simply realized that we would not be able to cover this tour with the drive and sense of purpose with which we've operated continuously since 1980. That determination came with a quickening sense that we'd reached the end of an era.  

Yes, you have.

"I spent most of my life as a musician measuring the distance between the American Dream and American reality." -Bruce Springsteen

Yes, you have.

And it's been pretty damn lucrative for you. But the difference between your American Dream and the reality of your fans - who have made you rich and famous - has become your greatest irony and hypocrisy.

My sympathy to the fans.

Bah Humbug

Your political overlords would like to wish you a very Merry Christmas Happy Nondenominational Gift Giving Random Day in December! Just don't ask them to do anything about the economy, inflation, gas prices, crime, the fentanyl crisis, national security, etc, peasants. They're doing just fine, and that's what matters.

The gift that keeps on taking

The stock market is plummeting, grocery prices are skyrocketing, 401k's are getting murdered and gas prices are still way high. I made two trips to the gas station in November and spent over $140 ($142.46 to be exact). This to put gas in a car that used to be filled from near-empty for around $50. 

Merry Christmas?

Moral Priorities of the Rich and Famous

These days most people have twigged to the fact that The Babylon Bee is a parody site, but that hasn't slowed them down. 

 

 

Because that would do it. According to our elites, conservatism bad, child porn references A-OK! I wonder if any stores have indignantly decided to stop carrying Balenciaga yet. Probably not.

It took Kim Kardashian, who has a deal with Balenciaga, days to even make a statement expressing concern. Not run from them screaming while cutting all ties, but just express concern. It made me wonder why she didn't just blow them off if for no other reason than public perception, seeing as she has made millions if not billions from a freaking piss tape! She can't possibly need the money. On the other hand, I think I just answered my own question. If getting famous for being urinated on and then the world seeing footage of it doesn't make you hide from said world out of extreme unbearable shame, then this photo shoot probably doesn't bother you...even though you have freaking children of your own!

 

Whether you buy into the child porn imagery, there's the fact that there's nothing really appealing about these photos, but someone still thought this was the best way to promote their product. They were perfectly happy to go with that until people started complaining.

Balenciaga had just survived a small scandal involving another controversial ad campaign that featured children alongside bondage materials, but the MyPillow scandal is threatening to sink the fashion company once and for all.

"Child abuse is one thing," said progressive activist Asher Carroll. "But being open to conservative viewpoints and buying a pillow from someone who supports the January 6 rioters, that is truly unforgivable."

Gotta love The Babylon Bee.

Famous idiot makes stunning and brave vehicular statement

A number of celebrities have been getting their panties in a wad over Elon Musk's purchase of Twitter because apparently they equate free speech with fascism, white supremacy, and various other imagined evils that are the opposite of their warped idea of freedom. Whatever. 

 

The point is when self-righteous celebs get on their high horses, you just know hilarity is gonna ensue. Most of the entertainment has been provided by blue-checked types announcing their departure from Twitter, then hanging out to see the reactions rather than following up by actually, you know, departing Twitter. I just have one thing to say about that:

Seriously, if you don't want to be on Twitter, just go. I did a couple years ago because Twitter had become a one-sided cesspool. Too many interesting accounts were being banned simply due to a difference in politics and it just wasn't fun anymore. I closed my account and never missed it. When the Musk purchase was announced, I decided to give it another shot and guess what - it's fun again! If someone or something offends me, I can simply block them. It's not like you're forced to read stuff you don't want to. 

Which leads us to this: Actress Alyssa Milano decided to make a big fat statement (while still retaining her Twitter account) about how despicable Elon Musk's Twitter is by announcing that she could no longer in good conscience drive a Tesla (but still retain her Twitter account, because without it, how could she make her super-informed, holier-than-thou opinions known to the great unwashed). 

So she stunningly and bravely traded in her Tesla for a Volkswagen EV. 

Why a VW, I have no idea, but if she was trying to make a humanitarian statement (and she was) it backfired on her spectacularly. 

This is what happens when you don't study history, kids.

 

From Wikipedia:

So in other words...

 

 

Enjoy the comments!