Christmas with Joan and the kids

Gotta wonder what Christmas was really like in that house. So scripted, plus I would have loved to have heard the kids address her as "Mommie Dearest." 

Days of Christmas

Ya think?

December is finally here!

I'm one of those people who, at the end of the year, can't start on one holiday until the other has passed. As far as I'm concerned, it's still summer through the end of September. Then on October 1, fall has officially arrived and I go from sunny summer vibe to autumn vibe. The fact that we're at the tail end of Daylight Saving Time becomes more and more apparent, until the time change in November and it's dark around 5pm. I always find the return to Standard Time to be kind of depressing, so it's nice to have the holidays as a distraction.

So on October 1 I bust out the autumn decorations, pick up some mini punkins, and that's pretty much the decor for October and November. I have a few Halloween decorations that are brought out, but I don't do a lot of full-on decorating until Christmas. Which for me doesn't start until we get through October and November.

So first I have to get through Halloween. Once that's over, the focus is on Thanksgiving. Even with all the Christmas stuff out in the stores I can't go there until we get through Thanksgiving. I can only do one holiday at a time.

 

But the day after Thanksgiving, I'm in full-on Christmas mode! Decorations, come on out! And also, the first Christmas blog post of the year:

Words of Wisdom

Slow month.

You, too, can make gut-wrenching magic out of your fiction by driving your tale to a conclusion further than you ever thought it could go. --Elizabeth Sims

You can't be precious about writing. You have to write it, get it down, and then you fix it. --Aaron Sorkin

The creative adult is the child that survived. --Ursula K. LeGuin

Art washes from the soul the dust of everyday life. --Pablo Picasso 

Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance you must keep moving. 

--Albert Einstein

 

Susan Smith denied parole

Hard to believe, but it's been thirty years since Susan Smith was convicted for the murder of her two young sons in 1994. This week she was eligible for parole for the first time and was denied. Good.

 

I've seen footage of Susan at her hearing and I have to say it gave me flashbacks to her performances at the time of the crime. The non-existent tears (you'd think she'd have figured out how to work up actual tears by now), the self-pity, the apparent lack of true remorse for her actions. She just wants out of prison. She claims to be Christian now and while I have my doubts, that's between her and God. But it was tough to listen to her state that God forgave her for her actions and she hoped the parole board would feel the same way. I mean, it's like nothing's changed. Thirty years in prison and she's the same person who offed her kids in the hope that the rich guy in town would marry her and solve her money problems.

 

"Tearful."

One of the things that really sticks in my mind during that period is finding out not only that she had been arrested for murder, but had admitted to it. I worked at an office in West Los Angeles and that day was a co-worker's birthday, so a bunch of us took her to lunch, and that lunch ran long. We finally got back to the office and shortly thereafter the news broke, and what I remember most is how angry everyone was. We had a lot of young (20's-30's) women in the office and a number of them had very young children, and none of us could fathom how someone could do that to her own children. People were pissed, and it wasn't just us - that was the prevailing response to the horrible news of what Smith had done to her sons.

I don't know what she thought would happen after she let that car, with her children strapped into the back seat, roll into John D. Long Lake. My guess is that she thought everyone would feel sorry for her, especially (hopefully) the guy she'd been dating who'd broken off with her because he didn't want the baggage of someone else's children (my guess - there were other issues and that was a convenient excuse). Some time would pass and eventually the car would be found, and everyone would assume that the "carjacker" dumped it in the lake. More time would pass and the crime would just go unsolved. In the meantime she'd marry rich guy and live it up. The worst part of that scenario is if someone had been arrested and tried for the non-existent crime. Given Smith's sociopathy, I could see her playing along and having an innocent man convicted figuring it would get her off the hook. I could see her doing that. What a terrifying thought.

David Smith, the boys' father, showed up to argue against her release. His wife and daughter also spoke, as did the prosecutor at the time of the crime and the current prosecutor. One of the hardest things about listening to them was when David pointed out that thirty years only amounted to fifteen years per child. 

 

Unless she does a complete 180 at some point, I don't think she's ever getting paroled. I think she was delusional to think she'd be released the first time she was eligible, given the heinousness and notoriety of her crimes. Smith will now be able to apply for parole every two years, but hopefully she'll continue to rot in prison for the rest of her life.

Little angels.

Happy Turkey Day!

Cover reveal!

We have an official cover reveal for Angel City Beat, the upcoming Sisters in Crime Los Angeles anthology that includes my story "Unbeatable", which involves an undefeated racehorse, a dead jockey, and a pet psychic.

 

 

 

We still don't have an exact release date, but it looks like officially it will be sometime in December.

Writer stuff

Almost every time, although I have gotten a couple of stories out of really vivid dreams.

 

 

This also works for "Idea in My Head" versus "Idea When I Write It Out".

In honor of Veteran's Day

Really, there aren't any sufficient words to describe how to honor those who served and especially those who gave their lives to protect our freedom and our country. They are true heroes, and they get one day out of the year to be officially recognized. One day.

All I can think to say is thank you. Thank you so much.

I feel a low-budget horror film coming on

Headlines!

Police hunt 42 monkeys that escaped from a South Carolina research facility.

All together now: What could possibly go wrong?

As a writer, this is my answer: Everything and more!

Let's dissect this article writer-style, shall we? Bold mine.

A police search is underway after 43 monkeys escaped from a research facility in South Carolina on Wednesday night.

Police in Yemassee, Beaufort County, said the Rhesus macaque primates escaped from Alpha Genesis, a business that provides "nonhuman primate products and bio-research services," according to its website. 

 

Uh-huh. So, research animals. Check!

The monkeys were a group of "very young females" that have never been used for testing. An Alpha Genesis spokesperson confirmed to police that the animals "are too young to carry disease," according to police statement.

 

So they do primate "research services", aka testing, but 43 animals are living there rent-free without having been subject to any testing. And as far as being "too young to carry disease", we vaccinate infants. 

 

But denial of danger to the public is typical of the people in charge of the danger, and this will definitely come back to bite the spokesperson in the ass as anyone who's ever seen a movie like this knows, so...check!

"Alpha Genesis currently have eyes on the primates and are working to entice them with food," police said Thursday afternoon.

 

In other words, we got nothing. We don't control them and are hoping they get hungry enough to be dumb enough to be captured. Great plan right there. The comedic breather before the upcoming carnage. Check.

Traps have also been set up and officers are using thermal imaging cameras in an attempt to recapture the animals, police said.

 

Cue the scene where an officer is scoping out a monkey via thermal imaging, only to have another killer monkey sneak up on him and attack, dispatching him in a most gory fashion. AKA, The "Clever girl!" scene. Check!

“Residents are strongly advised to keep doors and windows secured to prevent these animals from entering homes,” Yemassee Sheriff’s Department said in a statement. 

 

Primates are smart in real life, and they're even smarter in movies. Either way you know they'll find the one point of entry you forgot to secure. Check!

 

Anyone who finds a monkey should not interact with it but instead call 911, it said. 

 

No shit, Sherlock! But for the sake of playing along, we'll have the idiot character who doesn't know the difference between domesticated pets and wild animals, only to learn the hard way he's wrong. Or it could be some chick from PETA who is just so sure she can communicate with her sister primates, who stupidly thinks that they'll understand her and bond with her, giving her the opportunity to save the day....only to learn the hard way she's wrong. But we know what happens to both of these characters - they get ripped to shreds. Lots of screaming and blood. Check!

Alpha Genesis did not immediately respond to an overnight request for comment from NBC News.

 

Evil, mad scientists stonewalling the noble media. Check!

The company secured a federal contract to run a colony of 3,500 monkeys on Morgan Island off the coast of South Carolina, also known as Monkey Island. 

 

And there's your title: Monkey Island. Also, THREE THOUSAND, FIVE HUNDRED MONKEYS??? Who thought this was a good idea. Damn, you couldn't pay me enough to work on that island.

The Post and Courier newspaper in Beaufort County reported that primate escapes have happened several times before in the area, including in May this year, and in 2016 when 19 evaded security at Alpha Genesis before they were recaptured six hours later.

In 2022, three monkeys escaped following a traffic accident in rural Pennsylvania.

 

So it's happened before? Have you learned nothing from the previous escapes? Of course not. They never do.

 

Outbreak, anyone?

Noirvember meets Calvin & Hobbes

The curse of procrastination: A writer's lament

I am a world-class procrastinator. If there was an Olympics for procrastination, I would be showered in gold medals. I would be on the cover of Wheaties boxes. I am an expert on wasting time on frivolous crap like social media and online games like Scrabble and Solitaire when I should be writing.

I'm not saying any of this to brag. I'm not proud of it, in fact I hate it. I hate that's how my mind works.

 

I don't want to be a world-class procrastinator, but hey, we can't always have what we want.

To explain what brought on this rant:

A couple months ago I decided I wanted to submit a story for next year's Bouchercon anthology. Getting into a Bouchercon anthology has been on my short story bucket list for years. The 2025 conference is in New Orleans and not only am I eager to return to the French Quarter, I'd love to be in that particular collection. And since the deadline wasn't until November 1, I had plenty of time.

The theme for Bouchercon anthologies (besides crime) is usually tied to that year's location, and of course, the theme for Blood on the Bayou: Case Closed is NOLA based or inspired crime stories.

 

 

Because I am very much a Southern Californian and not a Southern Lousianian (is that the word?) and I've only been to NOLA once (for the 2016 Bouchercon) I decided I would approach the story from a tourist aspect. What tourist think they know about NOLA and its culture, as opposed to what little they actually know and/or understand. And eventually I settled on voodoo and a gift shop.

One of the things I read for research is New Orleans Voodoo: A Cultural History, and from page one it's a real eye-opener about the reality of New Orleans voodoo and how the practice is portrayed in film and television. It's so much different than I realized, so I decided to work that into the story. I also read the 2016 Bouchercon anthology Blood on the Bayou to see what kind of stories they published. It was a terrific read, highly recommended, and I really hope to be part of the next one.

But first, I had to write an actual story.

By mid-September I had a pretty good idea of the kind of story I wanted to write. It was inspired by my personal experiences involving a greedy, problematic family member in the aftermath of my Dad's death in 2011 (there was money involved and that almost always causes trouble) and familial betrayal in general. And that's what I've been mulling over for weeks now.

 

Part of the problem was that I couldn't figure out the actual story. An idea is one thing. For me that's the easy part. Taking the idea and turning it into a full-fledged story is where the work comes in. 

 

But as September and then October went by, I couldn't figure out what to do with my idea.

The deadline for this anthology finally arrived yesterday. At the beginning of the week the story was still nothing but bits and pieces and notes. I planned on dedicating the week to finishing the it because I really, really wanted to submit to this anthology, my lack of progress notwithstanding. And for the first few days of the week, nothing was happening.

Then, for some reason, I woke up Thursday morning and the story was there. I don't know how or why, it just was, in fact so much so that a large portion of it was written by noon. I finished and polished it on Friday and sent it in around 5:30pm. And I was thrilled - mission accomplished! I even finally figured out how to do em dashes!

Usually two days isn't enough to get a story polished to the point of submission, but this one was shorter than usual, plus the whole story takes place in one location and in real time so I didn't have to worry about moving the action around. And I'm genuinely happy with it. I really, really hope it gets selected but if it doesn't, I've got a great little story for future submissions.

That brings us back to procrastination. My usual MO is at first I take the approach that I have plenty of time before the deadline. Until I don't and that's when things get ugly, and frequently the result is that I don't finish the story in time to submit it, or it's so badly written that it doesn't get accepted, or I don't have a story at all. Again, I don't know why my mind works that way and it drives me nuts, but I guess there's something in my creative subconscious that just doesn't kick into gear until the deadline is looming.

 

Hopefully, at least in this case, the journey goes from the frustration of procrastination to laissez les bons temps rouler! And for good luck, here's some lovely pictures from when I was in New Orleans for Bouchercon in 2016. Amazing city.

Cafe du Monde. Beignets = Yummers.

Typical (and gorgeous) French Quarter architecture.

Mule-drawn carriages in the French Quarter.

Voodoo Blues.

Morning skies in NOLA from my hotel room.