Fex-Ex "Gripe Sheet" is hilarious

This was posted by The Federalist Papers on FB. According to the comments, this may have been going around for a while and attributed to various sources. Regardless of where it came from, it is hilarious.

So the story goes that after every flight, Fed-Ex pilots fill out what is referred to as a "gripe sheet" detailing any issues they had with the aircraft. The mechanics charged with fixing the problems are apparently comedians. Here are some of their responses. And here are some of my personal favorites: