It's the most wonderful time of the year!!!

Christmas on!!!

Recent reading: "The Lost Detective: Becoming Dashiell Hammett"

The Lost Detective: Becoming Dashiell Hammett by Nathan Ward

Before reading this Edgar-Award nominated book I was unaware that Hammett, the author of The Maltese Falcon and The Thin Man (which became one of my all-time favorite movies), had once been a Pinkerton detective.

Tuberculosis kept Hammett from making Pinkerton a lifelong career, but when he finally had to give up the work due to his poor health, he used his sleuthing experiences to embark on a second career as a writer. He held most pulp stories and fictional detectives and private eyes in disdain because he found them so unrealistic, and set out to create more realistic characters.

This book is not an autobiography - I had to get online to find out that Hammett and his wife did eventually divorce, that he joined the Communist Party and eventually ran afoul of the House Un-American Activities Committee, and even served time in prison due to his Communist involvement. Ward's focus is how Hammett's time with Pinkerton informed the great novels he went on to write, how his writing career developed and into the early years of his relationship with the writer Lillian Hellman, with whom he spent the last thirty years of his life. It's also a fascinating look at Pinkerton exploits and how real life sleuthing works.

By comparison, Hammett's Op had wrung some handy knowledge from his rough life of sleuthing: Abductions rarely occur at night or in cities, and those that do more likely are staged by the victim for ransom; no one can strangle your from the front if your arms are free to reach up and snap his pinkies; when a "Chinese" starts shooting, he always empties his gun; you can shadow anyone pretty naturally if you don't meet the subject's eye; it's best to stand aside of the door during "unannounced" visits in case bullets burst through it; even a light tap on the head with a metal revolver has a surprisingly concussive effect; you can often draw good information or even a confession "out of a feeble nature" by putting your face close to the subject's and talking loudly; people talk more freely in a room with a closed door; and any hop head who tells you his name is "John Ryan" is not to be trusted ("it's the John Smith of yeggdom").

Christmas post: Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer/Full Metal Jacket mashup

Yeah, I know I've posted this before, but I had to do it again. Tis the season! Merry Christmas!

Christmas post: Another Far Side cartoon

Rumor has it The Far Side may be coming back. How freaking awesome would that be?

Worst intern ever. And not a terribly great person, either.

So it's late December and someone who can't read your mind wishes you a Merry Christmas. How odd. You should go running to Human Resources to complain like the pitiful loser you are. And someone did: Whitney Cummings was reported to HR by an intern on her show for saying, "Merry Christmas".

Boo fucking hoo. I hope I never have to work with someone that petty, self-centered, weak, and unprofessional.

Also, you're an intern and she's the boss. So shut the fuck up and buckle up, buckaroo, because it's a tough world out there and it doesn't revolve around you. When you have a show of your own you can make the rules, including barring your wretchedly unhappy employees who would rather be working for anyone else from saying the dreaded MC words. Until then, shut your piehole. And if you're too stupid to figure that out, well, you were hired for exactly the reason Cummings explains here:

You just know this person was angling for a big payday from their deep-pocketed network. I can just imagine that conversation. "My boss wished me a Merry Christmas and now I'm too traumatized to work. But for the right price I think I can find a way to cope and feel better enough not to get a lawyer or make a big deal about it on social media."

I hope Cummings incorporates this into her next stand-up routine, because it's just that hilariously pathetic and laughable. Also, I'd love to know if that intern showed up for work on Christmas or accepted any gifts or bonuses, because, it's just another day, right?

It must be miserable going through life so miserable that that's what you complain to HR about. Seriously, this loser isn't going to make it in the real world if someone saying, "Merry Christmas" at Christmastime gets their panties in a wad.

Jackass.

From The Department of It's Funny Cuz It's True: CVS wrapping paper

I'm almost tempted to try this next year. It's not like I ever use the coupons, they expire so soon.

H/T to im not right in the head.com on FB.

Best. Santa. EVER!!!

Via Tropical Life, Food and Fun on FB (from last year).

Heck yeah I ordered this wine

In fact, I ordered two bottles.

I've been waiting years for TCM Wine Club to do a Bette Davis label, and I finally got it.

You don't have to be a member of the Wine Club to order. Follow this link if you're not a member and just want the Bette Davis Malbec.

I'm so glad they used this picture of her. I don't think she ever looked better than as Margo Channing.

Oh my God, this just came across my Instagram feed: Pet portraits on steroids

Iconic Paw will turn your pet's portrait into an old-timey masterpiece.

Needless to say, I'm sold. The only question is which outfit and which picture of Sophie. Although I'm leaning toward this one:

Doofus.

Just a thought

Or maybe he'd still be a jerk. Who knows?

Via Trish Martin from the Fame is a Bitch Obsessed FB page (from last year).

Castle Green tour

Last weekend The Brother and I got to tour Pasadena's historic Castle Green. Twice a year (in June and December) residents open their vintage apartments to the public. I'll definitely be going again in June. The place is beautiful and it was amazing seeing the classic apartments, especially how marvelously they utilized the small spaces in the singles (400-500 square feet). It was also clear the place attracts very creative people.

From the program:

There was a gentleman from the East Coast named Colonel George Green, a patent medicine manufacturer, who created the "August Flower", an elixir that cured all ills, including "a heavy load at the pit of the stomach", who regularly vacationed in Pasadena in the winter to escape the cold.

In 1891 he invested in a hotel located where Stats now stands, and over the next few years he enlarged and improved on the original, adding a wing across the street, the Green Hotel, now the Castle Green, which was completed in 1898 and became the social center for the East Coast gentry who arrived from the train station down the street in horse-drawn carriages, children and nannies in tow, to spend the winter months enjoying the wonderful California weather and the attractions of Pasadena.

Decades later the building fell on hard times and was even condemned at one point, until a group of admirers saved it by converting the hotel into condominiums. It is now comprised of fifty-two unique private residences. It is also listed as a Nationally Registered Historic Monument, a State Historical Monument, and a Designated Pasadena Treasure.

Designed with Moorish, Spanish, and Victorian themes, the building is gorgeous and provides a look at a long-vanished way of life. It has a manually operated caged elevator and life at Castle Green includes having full-time elevator operators. According to the program, it is the only manually operated elevator running on the West Coast.

Although we were told pictures were fine, I didn't take many of the actual apartments because it felt kind of invasive, even though the owners willingly opened their homes to us.

There are two rooms off the lobby, the Moorish and Turkish Rooms:

Per the program: The carpeting throughout is an exact replica of the original design of 1897 and has been manufactured by the same company, Axminster of London. This was researched through the use of computer generation, using early photos of Rudolph Valentino and Dorothy Gish standing in a hallway. Luckily, Axminster was able, through these photos, to find the original pattens for us. Here's a small sample:

Original tile.

The beautiful caged elevator. Unfortunately they take it out of commission for the tour.

A lot of the units have vintage appliances, which I am a total sucker for:

This apartment featured something I had never seen or heard of - a Clavicytherium. Basically, it's an upright harpsichord:

Merry Christmas from Castle Green!